Thursday, October 21, 2010

On Guard… Attack Is Imminent


I was reading an article titled Why Do Big Girls Get a Bad Rap? (Big Is Beautiful) over at freshexpress.com. The blogger wanted to know why some men have severe hang ups when it comes to plus size women. Which led me to another article titled “Do Blank Men Prefer their Women Larger?”

Let me be perfectly clear when I say that black women come in all sizes, all shades and all hair types. Truly God broke the mold when he made a black woman. Some of us have creamy white skin, some look like God used a bit of red clay in the design, many of us look like we have golden essence of the sun in our skin, while others look like God put a dash of cinnamon in our complexions, and some of us look like God used the finest, darkest coca bean when he made our skin.

We posse a great deal of strength and beauty yet it is constantly under attack. Our asses are too big , our boobs are too full, our lips were once considered too plump, our hair too kinky and our hips too wide. Imagine being constantly picked apart and told we like the full lips and the big ass. Shit even white women have accepted the lips and ass, just look and Kim Kardashian and Meg Ryan.! The other traits are deemed unacceptable, but not only by the majority, but by some of our own brothers!

Now there is nothing wrong with having preferences… they are simply measures that we use to determine what is attractive. I have preferences and hopefully you do too. However, preference does not mean this feature is better than that feature. It does not give men or women for that matter the right to say skinny is better than fat, long straight hair is better than short kinky hair ….ect. If anything we as black folk should have a broader understanding of beauty because our race is filled with a diverse look.




Check out this wig being sold at Kohls for Halloween. It’s a kinky afro wig named “The Ghetto Fab Wig”. I guess the white woman in the picture seems to think she looks ghetto fabulous! But I see many non-ghetto women rocking their real natural hair in this style. This is just another example of the world saying “This is another thing we don’t like black woman, your nappy afro hair”. It is a subtle subliminal message…but trust me I get it. I never seen a long blonde wig called the “Po White Trash Wig”.






I am so sick and tired of the world telling the black women she is not good enough. I just wanna throw up the middle finger and let them know I am not buying into your lies. You can brainwash whomever you like but you will never brain wash me. Yes I could stand to lose about 40lbs, but for health reasons not to fit inside some model thin dress. My hair is nappily natural and I love it, it’s not ghetto or any other demeaning name you can think of. Real beauty, true beauty is something on the inside, it doesn’t get old, it doesn’t need make up, it doesn’t require name brand shoes or clothing, it is unmistaken ably something divine, something that has been nurtured and purposefully hidden for only the true seekers to find.

Are You Serious?



Yesterday while getting ready for work I was stopped dead in my tracks when the Today show announced a segment about Anita Hill and Justice Clarence Thomas wife Virginia “ Ginny” Thomas. Ginny wanted Anita to apologize for accusing her husband of sexual harassment 19 years ago. I remember the case very well, during that time they were holding senate hearings to vote in Clarence as the new judicial Supreme Court justice.

When vetting a candidate it is not unusual for the FBI to do a complete back ground check on the perspective contender. They speak with past co-workers and other people who can relay professional and personal information about the candidate. Well in Clarence case they stumbled upon Anita and she told them about her experience with Clarence. She was led to believe that her interview would never be made public and this was simply a fact finding mission. However, the senate requested to view all information pertaining to Clarence during his confirmation hearings. Well that is when all hell broke loose.

On the tapes Anita claimed that Clarence sexually harassed her at their place of employment for about 3 years. She referred to specific incidents of Clarence’s behavior, including repeated requests for dates and references to pornographic material. On other occasions she testified he referred to the size of his own penis as being larger than normal and he also spoke on some occasions of the pleasures he had given to women with oral sex. Anita stated she was so stressed out a work, she decided it was better for her mental health to take a job teaching at Oral Roberts University.

Anita was called before the Senate to testify about what happened. I remember watching her on the screen and she looked completely embarrassed most of the time. Meanwhile Clarence simply looked angry, he stated the hearings "a national disgrace...a high-tech lynching for uppity blacks who in any way deign to think for themselves, to do for themselves." I agree that it seemed that the Senate wanted to expose every little nasty detail about his life. It is very rare that the FBI tapes are made public and I am sure a bit of racism was the reason behind it.

Needless to say the Republicans voted Clarence in and he became a Supreme Court Justice and Anita Hill went on with her life. However, many women of all nationalities believed (as I do), that she was telling the truth. In an effort to protect her career decided just to leave her job and keep quiet about the harassment. From that point going forward Clarence had lost all credibility in the black community, he was not considered an ally.


Now 19 years later here comes Ginny (come lately)Thomas calling Anita hill demanding an apology on behalf of her husband. Ginny left a voice message on Anita’s work phone saying…

Good morning, Anita Hill, it's Ginny Thomas,” said the voice. “I just wanted to reach across the airwaves and the years and ask you to consider something. I would love you to consider an apology sometime and some full explanation of why you did what you did with my husband. So give it some thought and certainly pray about this and come to understand why you did what you did. OK, have a good day.”


When Ginny was asked to confirm if she really left the voice mail she said…

I did place a call to Ms. Hill at her office extending an olive branch to her after all these years, in hopes that we could ultimately get past what happened so long ago. That offer still stands, I would be very happy to meet and talk with her if she would be willing to do the same. Certainly no offense was ever intended.”

Anita responded by saying, “I don’t apologize. I have no intention of apologizing, and I stand by my testimony in 1991.”


Anita kept it classy and gave a simple statement. But Mrs. Ginny I’ma say what Anita wanted to say but couldn’t say. Here it goes…


You extending me an olive branch? I don’t give two rat’s azzes about you! Who the f*ck do you think you are ! I ain’t thought about you in 19 years what the f*ck made you believe that I wanted to befriend you! And further more, b*tch don’t call me that that bullshit. I said what I said and I ain’t changing my story. It ain’t my fault that yo man came on to me. You need to check that nigga…not me. And just so you know… hell naw I ain’t sorry nor will I ever apologize. Hoe you got some nerve calling me talking about a muthaf*cking apology, are you f*cking retarded, crazy, outta yo rabbit as mind! See in a minute you gone make me step off this throne and beat yo azz. So you and yo boot licking, uncle tomming azz husband betta leave me the f*ck alone cuz this the last time I’ma speak to you about this. Next time b*tch it’s yo azz. Now run tell that!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Halloween Is Around the Corner... I have the perfect costume for ya

INTRODUCING THE BED INTRUDER COSTUME






TOLL FREE: 888-557-5459

(Costume Ships: October 20th)


Obvvioouuusllyyyy, this is the Official Antoine Dodson Costume!
So first hide ya kids, hide ya wife and order it today!


Costume includes:
• Antoine Dodson Custom Hair Wig
• Red Bandana
• Black Tank Top
• Antoine's Autographed rolled up paper

Friday, October 8, 2010

The New Definition of Swagger



Roland is now selling ascots. He says on his website that this is the new definition of swagger. Honestly Roland, you look kinda of gay-ish in the picture. I am in no way implying that homosexuals do not have swagger, cuz trust me they do! But I think even they would agree that swagger is not the word we will use for you in the picture above. For god sake’s you have a bloom of a flower in your hand, showing all 32 of yo teef, with a come-hither look in yo eyes. Please talk to your advertising folks cuz this pic doesn’t make a grown ass man purchase an ascot nor does it boost up his swagger.

Simply Magnificent




On my way to sleep last night I heard some fabulous news concerning our Fist Lady Mrs. Michelle Obama. I was drifting off to sleep when the anchor woman said that Michelle Obama had been named by Forbes Magazine as the most influential/powerful woman in the WORLD! It brought a huge smile to my face. I felt very proud and wished I could drop by the white house so I could give her a fist bump.

It made me feel like some one in my family had pushed passed the glass ceiling. Like my big sister had just broken a barrier that left the path wide open for the rest of us. I feel the same way about my other homie Oprah. They both make me want to press harder, go further, reach wider, be uncompromising, and stay the course until I succeed.

I love them both because they are not your typical success story. Both came from blue collar backgrounds and worked hard to succeed in their chosen fields. Neither climbed the letter of success by using their sexuality and both are smart as a whip. Oprah nor Michelle is considered drop dead gorgeous by today’s standards, but they both have a beauty that is so amazing, deep and profound that you can’t help but find them exquisite and admire their loveliness and splendor.


What can I say they are my idols and in my head they are my mentors. I remember interviewing for a job over the phone and I wanted to sound powerful, concise and basically impress the interviewer. I sat down at the kitchen table and put Oprah’s magazine in front of me. I just stared at her cover and said “ Lord if you can do it for her, you can do it for me”. Guess what… I got the job. That is how inspired these women make me feel.


I just want to congratulate First Lady Chelle and say great job. You are a wonderful shining exemplary example of what we all can be if we stay focused and put ourselves in the driver’s seat of our own lives.

Monday, October 4, 2010

35... Are You Serious?



Do I look like I am about to turn 35! I am having the birthday blues and my birthday is less than two months away. Turning 35 should be a reason to celebrate but I feel old. Part of me is happy to see 35 because so many people don’t get a chance, but the other part of me ask what the hell have you been doing for 35 years. I am not happy with my job, I would like to be on more solid ground financially, I am still working on self esteem issues, and I am always working on losing weight. Basically I am not satisfied with myself and I am always finding some way to improve myself. I wonder if this is a lifetime thing.


On a positive note, I got my Essence magazine a few weeks ago and they listed tips on how to further your career. Normally I would look at these things and think how I could integrate them into my life. This time I just glanced at the tips and grunted. I did not create a list of things to buy, ways to improve or even equate it with my life. For me this is a HUGE accomplishment, I use to always look for ways to reinvent myself like the black successful women in the magazine. Well guess what world…. I am not the frigging woman in the magazine….. I am me. Trust me there is no lack of ambition in my life…however if I am going to succeed it will be because of me, not some stupid tip I got out of a magazine.

By now I thought I would have a husband and a few kids. I have neither; I must admit I want the kids more than the husband. I have not found someone that I want to spend the REST of my life with. I am not ashamed of that, I feel it is better to live happily with yourself than to get tied down with someone you don’t really care for. Better yet someone you are trying to create into a better man for you, this seems to be more of the case for me.


But this 35 thing is so bothersome. Hell I remember being 17, 21 and 25 so vividly. Actually it seemed like yesterday and now I feel like the old lady. Since when did I get so concerned about investments, 401k, life insurance and other old folks things.


Now my body requires sleep and will take it if I don’t give it. Just last week I was up studying later than normal, I got about 3.5 hours of sleep. Mannnnnnn I fell asleep at work. I was looking at the computer and the next thing I know my co-worker was shaking me telling me to wake up before I get in trouble.

Things hurt when I get out of bed. To lessen the hurt I am required to stretch. People get on my nerves so quick, my patience is completely gone. I hate to argue it gives me a headache, but I can not tolerance for disrespect. I have gotten into more arguments in the last few years about men disrespecting women then ever.

Oh by the way when did I become a feminist and practice philanthropy. Your priorities sure change with age, don’t they. I just hope I don’t have the blues on December 5th like I did when I turned 30. I sure hope this is just a passing fad