Failure Does Not Look Good On Me 1

This summer I start school, I will be taking my pre-engineering classes in hopes of one day becoming a civil engineer. This is my 3rd time going back to school, but this time is different. This time it feels like a challenge, this time I know I will have to fight tooth and nail to accomplish this goal. Although I have a master’s degree, this degree will mean more to me than the first two.


Let me explain. I did not do exceptionally well in high school. I did enough to pass and get by, but I certainly did not win any accolades for being a great student. I accepted D’s, was happy with a C, excited with a B, elated with an A, but the A’s were few and far between. I lived with my aunt and she worked a lot and did not really focus too much on me academically. As long as I went to school and did not become pregnant she thought I was a wonderful kid, talk about low expectations.

Then there was the school I attended, it focused solely on academics. The name of my high school was Center for Management, Law and Public Policy. The school focused on grooming the managers, lawyers and politicians of the future. The school was small….very small, we had about 500 students. There was little to no pressure to fit in, the teachers and administration knew all the students personally and all the students were expected to go to college.

Of course it is very rare that 100% of students at any given school would get into college, but that was the expectation. If students did not show a high aptitude in learning they were left behind. The tutoring programs were directed at students that were at risk losing their 4.0-3.0 grade point average. Yes tutoring was only for the smart kids; you had to have a high enough GPA to qualify for tutoring! Although we did not offer special education classes if students GPA dropped below a 3.0, they were placed in “slower paced” classes. I was placed in two “slower paced/less intense” classes, the first was Civics and the second was English. I loved both teachers, Ms. Smith and Ms Parker were both awesome teachers, they made their students feel wanted and often offered great advise. However, they did not demand much from me. I was able to talk as much as I wanted and lectures were short and to the point. The work was easy and required only that you could read with comprehension. Needless to say I did not feel challenged but I was passing.

I spent two years of my four year high school years going to summer school. Because I did not qualify for tutoring I had to go to summer school for the classes that I did not pass. All of my high school friends were honor roll students and were treated like royalty by the teachers. Me…..I was accepted but looked down on. I always excelled in history due to my love for reading. This was my secret passion I loved history and loved to read anything that kept my attention. I could excel in history without trying.