The little Prince at the top is my new nephew Dreyden. Isn’t he soooo sweet and gorgeous. He is so small but when you hold him close he is super soft and smell like baby. Well this little one caused me to want to jump out a window and set myself on fire at the same time!
You may ask yourself how someone so little and beautiful could make you cause bodily harm to yourself. Well I can sum that up in two words…. Darius ( nephew # 1) and Derrick ( nephew # 2) ( see their pics below). Yeah they look innocent too until it is time to baby sit.
I had to watch these two while my sister when into the hospital to have Baby Dre. LLLLLLLLLLLLord have mercy. It was a time. I worked 15 hours of overtime that week and worked 7 days straight. I picked up the kids on my 7th day of working without a day off. Needless to say I was bone tired and not in the mood for not freaking kids. I picked the kids up around 8:30 pm and hoped they were fed and tired and ready to go to bed when they got to my place. NOT! They were bouncing off the wall and I was dying to go to bed. I gave them a bath and a snack and begged them to go to sleep. Finally everyone was in bed by 10:30pm.
RING>>>>RING>>>>RING…. That ringing was my alarm going off at 7:00am it was time to get up and get Darius ready for school. Got damn the boy pissed in the bed and smelled like hot pee. So another bath was needed and now we are late. I throw my coat over my pjs and tell my 3 year old nephew to but on his shoes and coat. He kept whining because he had on his pjs too and wanted to get dressed. I gave him the dreaded evil eye and he shut right up. Me and the kids drove all the way across town and dropped Darius off to school. Never mind the fact we were late and I had to walk him to his class. Other teachers gave me the poor you look when they saw me in my head scarf and pjs and toting a toddler in his pjs too.
I drove home thinking me and nephew # 2 would get some breakfast from McDonalds and take a nap until noon. Did ht happen that way….HELL NAW. Nephew ate his pancakes and was ready to play and watch Sesame Street. The poor chile kept asking me for paper and crayons so he could do his “homework”. Before I knew it, it was time to pick up nephew #1. I picked him up and he was talking the entire way home. I thought it would be a good idea to take them to the park and tire them out before we went home. They played at the park almost 3 hours and I still had to drag them to the car. I got home and started preparing dinner and helped nephew # 1 with his homework. They ate, took a bath and watched television for a few hours and I put them to bed at 7:00pm Yeah I know it was early but I had not choice I was running on fumes I was still so sleepy.
I told them that they better get in the bed and do not get out unless they had to pee. I also told them if anyone pees on my good mattress tonight they would wake up to a good azz whooping. Of course they talked and giggled for about 30 minutes but they eventually drifted off to sleep. I had to watch dishes, clean up the house and take a shower. Finally some me time. I sat down to watch the news and next thing I know. RING, RING, RING…yes it was my alarm telling me it was time to get up and get nephew #1 off to school.
The last thing I remember was watching the news and it’s a new day all ready? Got the kids up and no one peed so we could jump right into the day. Nephew #1 made sure to remind me to get him a snack today because I forgot it the day before. We picked up the snack and dropped him off ( please tell me why the pick up and drop off line for elementary kids are so long?) My sister had already given birth and nephew #1 was dying to see his Mommie and new brother. So we go to the hospital and find a parking spot. We parked pretty far away so the walk was very challenging with a slow walking 3 year old. We finally make our way to the 9th floor only to be told that due to the swine flu epidemic kids under the age of 18 were not allowed to visit the hospital. The poor nurse allowed me to speak to my sister via the phone who told me she was sorry but she forgot to tell me the kids could not visit. However, she left her house a mess and she did not want to bring the baby home to a messy house……she asked me to clean up a lil bit. So the nurse sent out the key and off we went to straighten up the house.
I opened the door and wanted to run back out. The kitchen had standing dish water and dishes inside the sink, the bath room could use a good wash down, the kids room was a mess, her bed was messy and a few things sprawled about, the living room needed dusting and the entire place needed vacuumed. I was cleaning for 5 hours…next thing I know it was time to pick up nephew # 1. Since I still had a little cleaning to do I bought McDonalds and took them to their house while I did more cleaning. Finally exhausted and completely tired we traveled back across town to my house.
I went to bed super excited because I knew this was my last night with the kids. I bathe them and let them watch a few hours of television and we did homework and off to bed they went. I again reminded them of the consequences of peeing on my good mattress. My house was a total wreck… toys everywhere, books, papers and crayons scattered on the floor and couch. Pop tart and fruit snack wrappers here and there but I was too tired to think about cleaning my own house.
That morning the alarm went off and I jump straight up I checked the bed and realized nephew #1 had peed in the bed again. I ran the bath water and told him to get up. I calmly asked if he had pissed in the bed. He simply shook his head. I told him to take off his clothes and I would be right back. I went and got my belt and I came back into the room and he was naked looking for his school uniform which I usually lay on the bed in the morning. He almost went onto cardiac arrest when he saw the belt… I have him a few smacks on the butt and told him to get into the tub. The room smelled like a toilet. The aroma of pee was heavy in the air. I got the kids ready and dropped nephew # 1 off to school. I had an early doctor’s appointment so I was forced to take nephew# 2 with me. We were leaving the house and I had my hands filled with things for the new baby and I opened the door to let him out first so I could lock the door. As soon as I opened the door he bolted out the house and down the stairs. I screamed at the top of my lungs…don’t run into the street. Guess what………..he did. I then heard a screeching sound of car tires. I dropped the bags and ran into the street. At that moment I felt like the worst would be parent in the world. All eyes were on me… the bad Auntie that almost got nephew #2 killed.
Finally that night I dropped the kids off to their mama. I was so in a rush to get home I barely glanced at new nephew #3. I just was ready to go home, relax and enjoy a glass of wine in my messy house. Well the next day my sister called me frantic. She said nephew #2 had to be hospitalized because he came down with a very high fever and was diagnosed with H1N1 aka “The Swine Flu”. She said could you be with him in the hospital because I can not be exposed to the flu and go home to the baby.
Could it get any worse! After three days he was discharged and allowed to go home. By the end of the week I was exhausted and began to wonder if I was cut out for the motherhood thang. All these years I wondered when was I going to have a little one running around the house? I even imagined what my baby shower would be…that was until I had a week of kids? Honnnay I serious doubt I wanna do the kid thing. I had more appreciation for my single non kid life than ever. She being a mother is HARD work…. I’m lazy yall and it was way too much to me.
But I tip my hat to all the mothers because it is truly one of the hardest jobs I’ve ever attempted to encounter.
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