Friday, December 31, 2010

Resolve to Make 2011 Better Than 2010

Can you believe that it is almost 2011.....I cant. The year flew by so fast. Honestly I can't say that I will miss 2010 because a lot of messed of stuff happened to me personally and globally. I am hoping that 2011 brings blessings, hope, peace, prosperity, love, joy, happiness, serenity, life, abundance, patience, sisterhood and brotherhood.

I've noticed that I have become my worst enemy. I complain, I get frustrated, I point fingers and blame people for things that I created. Just this week it dawn on me that I need to be a more thankful for my position in life. I have been in worse situations. Also I need to stop letting people take me off my throne. By that, I mean letting actions of others cause me to act outside my character.

I will be making a great deal of personal and charcter changes in 2011. I want to bring peace and happiness with me where ever I go. I want people to feel good when they are in my presence. But in order to have people feel that way... I too must feel that way.

I wish you and your family I wonderful New Year.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Punk Azz Dems




So it seems some Democrats are not feeling the proposed tax package between President Obama and the Republicans. The package would extend tax cut to the wealthy, extend unemployment benefits for 13 months and cut of two percentage points in the pay roll tax. In addition, the plan extends current tax breaks for students and lower income Americans, and adjusts the estate taxes in a way that the Dems believe will only benefit the wealthy.


The President has been accused of compromising and not keeping his promise to cut taxes for middle class Americans. Republicans would not agree to keep tax cuts for the middle class while letting the tax cuts for the wealthy expire; it was an all or nothing deal. Not to mention, they were willing to let millions of unemployed American benefits expire, unless they got what they wanted.

Needless to say, the Dems slammed Obama for agreeing to such a deal. I seriously want to slap the shit out of the Dems. So now they wanna act like they got a voice… where the hell was the voice during the mid term elections. The Republicans have been kicking ass and taking names since the mid terms, Dems have been acting like scared little ……ahem…..female dogs.

I am so pissed I am thinking about becoming an independent, because the Dems are weak. The President main concern was for the unemployed… the people who are suffering. Yes, we know that primary concern of the Republicans is the wealthy. Many of their constituents are rich and white, that is their focus and their base. The Dems on the on the other hand are going rogue… they are not giving the Prez the support he needs, nor do they stand unified on any one issue.

Pundits and others say we can’t afford to extend unemployment benefits, but there are many things in the budget that we cant afford and we are not giving those things up. I feel the Prez is doing the best he can, with the scraps he was given. He did not create this recession; he came into office under a recession. How can a man fix something in two years, when it took 8 years to create?


Personally, I do not believe that tax breaks for the wealthy and unemployment benefits should even be discussed in the same sentence, let alone together in a bill. However, if that is what is needed to ensure that millions of Americans are able to feed their families and stay in their homes I stand behind the Prez on this one. There will be a time to fight and when the time comes I believe he will be ready. It is not cool to fight over the lives of people who depend on unemployment

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

World AIDS Day



Today is World AIDS day and I feel sad. I feel sad because so many people are suffering from a preventable disease. I remember when AIDS first came on the scene in the early 80’s. I don’t know which was more frightening…. AIDS or the crack epidemic. Both had hit at the same time, initially AIDS was thought to be a white gay mans disease. Needless to say many people in the black community ignored the disease and thought it would never be a problem for them. Fast forward 20 years and AIDS are taking many black lives. With all the medical advances with AIDS people don’t feel scared of AIDS… it’s a “livable” illness. But it is also a preventable illness. I will not lie, there have been times when I was irresponsible with my sexual health. I have had unprotected sex more times than I can count…and if I contracted the disease it would have been MY fault, because in the end each person is responsible for protecting their own bodies. In this era the claps is a thing of the past… penicillin is no longer a cure all. AIDS medication is serious and has some horrible side effects. I know some people that take at least 21 pills a day, some lose their hair, have constant yeast infections, kidney damage and a great deal of toxins in their body due to all the medication. Not to mention that the medication is expensive as hell… insurance only covers a portion of the prescription. My plea to you is to get tested at least once a year. Know your status and protect yourself.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Women Controlling The Purse Strings....Bad For The Relationship




When I was a little girl in the mid 80’s I remember my Mama singing a song from a perfume commercial. It said…


I can bring home the bacon
Fry it in a pan
And never ever let you forget you’re a man
Cause I’m a WOMAN!

I can rub and scrub this old house til its shining like a dime
Feed the baby, grease the car and powder my face at the same time
Get all dressed up, go out and swing til 4 am and then
Lay down at 5 jump up at 6 and start all over again
Cause I’m a WOMAN!



Mama would be singing this song as she folded the clothes, vacuumed the floor, and moved the furniture around. This little song made me feel like I could do anything. It sent a little subliminal message to my brain saying you can do it all! Pay the mortgage, wash the car, take out the trash, fix the plumbing, change the tire, breast feed the baby, work 9-10 hour days 6days a week. Hell I watched Mama do it all the time, no need to believe I couldn’t do it too.


As I grew up and watch the women of my family be the breadwinners of their households it became very clear that I would run my household the same way. But I was always open to a man being the breadwinner and my income would be used to make the ends meet. My dating life was pretty normal, most of the men I dated held their own. They were financially independent and never looked for me to provide for them financially. Hell, many of them provided for me when I didn’t have a great deal of money.

Then I came across a man that I cared for very deeply….but he did not have a job. He didn’t have an emergency fund, he barely had a place to live and nothing to really offer me at the time. However, I fell in love with the man and felt that he was just going through a rough time and who was I to be judgmental of situation.

As we dated he would find a job here and there but could never seem to keep the job. Even when he did find employment he only made slightly more than minimum wage. We moved in together but he was never able to contribute to the household. He did not have presentable clothes and he needed so many things. I initially tried to help him and build him up as much as I could but it was getting very tiring.

After awhile he seemed to resent that I had a career and he didn’t. Our sex life came to a screeching halt. Each time he told me he couldn’t contribute or he lost another job my respect for him dwindled. It seemed the harder he looked for a job, the less call backs he would get. I started to resent the fact that he stayed home and I had to go to work. I would come home dead tired and he would want to talk all night.

I started to disrespect him by throwing his unemployment situation up as much as I could. He would disrespect me by calling me everything but the child of God. It got to the point where the house was always filled with tension. I was used to taking care of myself and if I was in a relationship my man would throw out a few dollars here and there.

This “man with no job” situation was foreign to me and after about 2 ½ years of it I started to feel like a hoe and my man was my pimp. I realized that a relationship can’t exist on love alone…….at least not for ME! I want to feel protected, I want to feel secure, and I want to feel like my man would do anything (legal) to hold down our household. I don’t want to be the HNIC when I have a man in the house.


Ultimately, the relationship did not work. But it was mostly wrecked because I could not take living with a man that could not offer me financial stability. Whether we like it or not roles are reversing, women are out earning men. It is causing many divorces, unhappy homes and breakups. Although I am a modern chick, I do expect my man to be the provider and head of the household. I expect him to know his role and accept that it is presumed that he will be making spiritual, financial and other decisions for the household. It’s a big responsibility for a man that is ready to take charge.

Now this in no way means that I wouldn’t hold my man down if we happen to fall on bad times. If I know that the man is a go getter and has proven that he will be my rock the I have no problem swinging my feet out the bed and going to work while he get his affairs in order. However, if you just playing around saying, “the man holding a brother down” and bullshitting around…then you may get left standing in the wind. I often wonder if single mothers have ruined the little girls and the little boys of America. Little girls watch Mama work and hold down the house and little boys get accustomed to Mama going to work and being the provider. The kids get all twisted and boys get their roles confused and so do girls.


What are your thoughts on this?

Friday, November 5, 2010

Rick Ross Suffers From Mutiple Personality Disorder

think I am big Meech

I think I am Larry Hoover

I’m MC Hammer

They call me Rick Ross...



The pseudo dope dealer, money making whose real name is William Leonard Roberts II think he is every body. I am starting to think that Rick Ross has multi personality problems. He aligns his image with those that were heavy in the dope gain or had great success and try to make us believe he is a representation of that group.

His past employer may remember when he looked like this.




But now he looks like this



He cleans up well doesn’t he?


Freeway Ricky Ross' lawsuit against rapper Rick Ross came to an end following the dismissal of the case.

It appears that the battle between former drug dealer Freeway Ricky Ross and rapper Rick Ross over the name “Rick Ross” may have finally come to a close. AllHipHop.com reports that the lawsuit against Rick Ross was dismissed earlier this week on Monday, November 1.

According to a court document the case was dismissed because the plaintiff, Freeway Ricky Ross, was unable to prove that his name was an actual trademark.


This sucks Fat Ricky basically stole the man life and made millions. Y’all know damn well Fat Ricky ain’t sold no kilograms or bricks. I will bet my life that Fat Ricky can’t spell Noriega let alone met the man. Considering that Fat Ricky keeps jacking other people persona only demonstrates how much a scam rap has become. That fool ain’t nothing more than a studio gansta.

Fortunately for him the new generation of hip hop does not require authenticity. Remember when a person found out Vanilla Ice lived a nice cozy life in the suburbs but was portraying to be a hard core street living thug? He got rejected by his audience as a fake and lost all credibility. Not any more….. since have the country is in sever debt because we pretend to be something we are not….we can now accept mirages like Fat Ricky.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

My Voting Dilemma






I DID vote today. But I must admit it was very problematic. I went to my usual voting place only to find that they no longer vote at that location. I kindly asked the teacher “where can I find the new polling station”, she replied
“I’dontkno”.

So I sit out in my car with my friend and try to use my smart phone to find the new polling place. After playing around on the board of election website I finally find the new place. I only have twenty minutes left to vote, so I run inside the place and give them my identification. I see the man with a strange look on his face. He asks me for my address I quickly recite it. He says I don’t see your name in our book. My friend gives his address; he says we don’t see your name either. They send us over to the inactive voter table and another lady check the inactive voter book and don’t find either of our names.


I start to get slightly agitated. I said “ look I have been voting since I was 18, I recently voted in the 2008 elections and I am a register voter so please find out what the problem is so I can leave and go to work.” So one lady hears the commotion and comes over and says I remember them from last time… let them vote. The lady at the inactive desk thought it was best to call the board of election. At this point I am 15 minutes behind the time I should have left for work.


She gets off the phone and tells me that “the system” is down and no one can verify if I am registered to vote and my friend voting poll is across town. Now he is upset, he says how did my polling place move? The lady says , “they say you live on the north side of town.” He replied, “I’ve never lived on the north side!”

Finally they tell me that I can do a provisional vote and my friend has to go across town to vote. I start breathing all heavy and ask, “Is my vote going to count?” The lady assured me that my vote will be counted once the system is up and they verify I am a registered voter. I begrudgingly filled out the “provisional” voter card. It was just a mess!


But don’t let me experience stop you. GET OUT AND VOTE

Monday, November 1, 2010

It's Getting Hard Out Here!




FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Armed security guards will be on hand at 36 unemployment offices around Indiana in what a state agency says is a step to improve safety and make branch security more consistent.

No specific incidents prompted the action, Department of Workforce Development spokesman Marc Lotter told The Journal Gazette for a story Wednesday.
Lotter said the agency is merely being cautious with the approach of an early-December deadline when thousands of Indiana residents could see their unemployment benefits end after exhausting the maximum 99 weeks provided through multiple federal extension periods.

"Given the upcoming expiration of the federal extensions and the increased stress on some of the unemployed, we thought added security would provide an extra level of protection for our employees and clients," he said.

The overall cost for the security is $1 million, paid for with federal funds designated for administration of the unemployment system, Lotter said.
State employees in the affected offices have also recently gone through stress-management training in which they learn how to respond appropriately to angry clients, he said.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

The Republicans Want Your Vote





These are the billboards hanging in Houston,Tx. Here is one of the comments on the ragingelephant website.


THIS IS AWESOME!! Keep up the good work guy’s. i am proud of you. i hope you don’t mind, I am a white woman but I stand behind this 100% I am sick and tired of the Left telling the Black Community that they can’t make it on their own, that they need the Gov to do it for them. Why Liberals? Do you find them weak? Do you find them stupid? Or is the fact that they are good people who love Family, God and hard work making you Jealous? I can’t take it any more!! Black people are strong, smart, family loving, God loving, hard working and VERY FUN people. I just wish the Left would STOP taking your pride!! I pray everyday that you rise above the leftist hatered toward the good Black people of America! God bless you all and stay strong!! AWESOME!!


Can They Count On Your Vote?

For Colored Girls




I had to an opportunity to see the theatrical adaptation of Ntozake Shange choreopoem For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf. I have never read the book and only recently took interest when Tyler Perry started to advertise for his film adaptation of the choreopoem. I was blown away by the play; it tapped in to all of my emotions. I was happy, sad, proud, torn, depressed, regretful and enraged. The play took my emotions on a roller coaster ride. Each charter reminded me of something I may have experienced in my past.

To me the play represented the plight of many women. How sometimes we knowing share a man, how we stay with a man that mistreats us and beat us, how we flaunt the perfectness of relationships in the face of other women and how the scars of rape can debilitate a woman to her core.

I cried and laughed during the play. However, I did leave thinking about all the time I wasted with people who meant me no good. How long I stayed in relationships that were worthless. I wonder how Tyler Perry’s adaptation will stand up to the play. Based on his previous movies I must admit I am a little worried. If he pulls this off he may be asked to direct more movies that he did not write himself. If it is a failure he can count on writing some more Madea movies.

The play was beautiful; I hope the movie is too. Have you ever read the book or seen the play? If so what was your thoughts?

Target and Plus Size





I was recently emailed a petition to sign. It was petitioning Target to increase the selection of plus sized women clothing. The petition stated the following…


To: Target Corporation
Dear Target,

Each season, you skillfully and beautifully execute exclusive designer collaborations and partnerships with leading fashion designers. As plus size women, we are oft neglected, overlooked and always sized out of your collections.

Why?

We have money to spend as much as our straight sized sisters do. We love to look just as fabulous as the other Fashionistas, yet you neglect to even think of us in the equation. We fawn over the Zac Posen for Target, and strategically finagle through the cuts that could pass on our curves; salaciously we look as each fantastic and highly coveted collaboration passes us along- due to you ignoring our thirst and hunger for fashion.

Why?

Therefore, I, Marie Denee of The Curvy Fashionista, Patrice of Afrobella, and Sarah of Style It Online have come together with our followers and the fa(t)shionistas within the plus size community to request, demand, and call for an inclusion of and/or special designer collaborations for the plus size fa(t)shionistas.
Sincerely,


The Undersigned


Of course I signed the petition because I love Target ……….but the plus size collection sucks! ¾ of the floor is filled with misses and “regular” sized clothes. ¼ of the sales floor is split between maternity and plus sized clothing. Actually it hard to tell the difference between maternity and plus size because they all look hideous. The “regular” sized clothing represents all the latest fashion trends and sometimes they get high end designers to actually design a line. Waymart has a better plus size section than Target. Could it be that increasing plus size clothing options would ruin Target’s branding? We all know they are the priciest big box retail store. Some folks call them Tar΄ jhet (Tarjay) very French and fo-fo store. But I love Target. I love the accessories for my home and the fact that it is always clean, well lit and have the latest trendy stuff. As a matter of fact I have loved Target since I was a little girl. We rarely shopped at Target but when we did I would run around the store saying “I want this, I want that and this too”. Now as an adult I can’t get any good clothes from Target. They tease me as I walk pass the misses section and see skinny jeans, fitted tees, beautiful cardigans, professional work wear and the most beautiful dresses. I walk over to the plus size and I see a bunch moo-moo’s and very unstylish items. Considered there is only 4-5 racks the options are very limited. If you feel the same way please sign the petition.


http://www.petitiononline.com/plus9231/petition.html

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Another Beyonce Story




Yesterday the television and the internet was on fire with rumors about Beyonce being pregnant. US Weekly confirmed it, ABC had some white lady on their saying how surprised and happy the couple was about their baby news. All the black blogs had it posted. Really it was like the next Messiah was in Beyonce’s womb! I just don’t get it, why is the world waiting on this woman and man to procreate? Both of them are rich and decent looking folks but I just don’t get the hoopla, surely Will and Jada did not have the public pushing for pregnancy, Russell and Kimora didn’t have this problem, Alicia and Swizz (okay bad example), I wonder if Ruby Dee and Ossie had this problem. I’m just trying to figure it all out.

Maybe people are infatuated with this couple because they guard their privacy. Some may be looking for any morsel of information. But imagine being Beyonce, it must be very tiring to hear you are pregnant all the damn time. Not to mention the minute you get pregnant people are going to be watching to see just how fat you get and the minute you have the baby people want you to lose all the baby fat. I’m sure her husband wants a baby, but obviously he loves her enough to let her peacefully pursue her career dreams and ambitions and when/if THEY are ready THEY will have a baby.

My heart does out to you Jay and Bey. It must seems be hard to breathe under all the pressures of the people. To have to live up to an illusionary contrived state of being must really suck! Having to be perfect ALL the time, seeming like you never have a bad day or problems. Can’t even enjoy a damn big mac and fries without people assuming you’re knocked up. It seems to be really hard to be considered as super human.


BTW, Beyonce’s Mom confirmed to Ellen DeGeneres that Beyonce is NOT pregnant

On Guard… Attack Is Imminent


I was reading an article titled Why Do Big Girls Get a Bad Rap? (Big Is Beautiful) over at freshexpress.com. The blogger wanted to know why some men have severe hang ups when it comes to plus size women. Which led me to another article titled “Do Blank Men Prefer their Women Larger?”

Let me be perfectly clear when I say that black women come in all sizes, all shades and all hair types. Truly God broke the mold when he made a black woman. Some of us have creamy white skin, some look like God used a bit of red clay in the design, many of us look like we have golden essence of the sun in our skin, while others look like God put a dash of cinnamon in our complexions, and some of us look like God used the finest, darkest coca bean when he made our skin.

We posse a great deal of strength and beauty yet it is constantly under attack. Our asses are too big , our boobs are too full, our lips were once considered too plump, our hair too kinky and our hips too wide. Imagine being constantly picked apart and told we like the full lips and the big ass. Shit even white women have accepted the lips and ass, just look and Kim Kardashian and Meg Ryan.! The other traits are deemed unacceptable, but not only by the majority, but by some of our own brothers!

Now there is nothing wrong with having preferences… they are simply measures that we use to determine what is attractive. I have preferences and hopefully you do too. However, preference does not mean this feature is better than that feature. It does not give men or women for that matter the right to say skinny is better than fat, long straight hair is better than short kinky hair ….ect. If anything we as black folk should have a broader understanding of beauty because our race is filled with a diverse look.




Check out this wig being sold at Kohls for Halloween. It’s a kinky afro wig named “The Ghetto Fab Wig”. I guess the white woman in the picture seems to think she looks ghetto fabulous! But I see many non-ghetto women rocking their real natural hair in this style. This is just another example of the world saying “This is another thing we don’t like black woman, your nappy afro hair”. It is a subtle subliminal message…but trust me I get it. I never seen a long blonde wig called the “Po White Trash Wig”.






I am so sick and tired of the world telling the black women she is not good enough. I just wanna throw up the middle finger and let them know I am not buying into your lies. You can brainwash whomever you like but you will never brain wash me. Yes I could stand to lose about 40lbs, but for health reasons not to fit inside some model thin dress. My hair is nappily natural and I love it, it’s not ghetto or any other demeaning name you can think of. Real beauty, true beauty is something on the inside, it doesn’t get old, it doesn’t need make up, it doesn’t require name brand shoes or clothing, it is unmistaken ably something divine, something that has been nurtured and purposefully hidden for only the true seekers to find.

Are You Serious?



Yesterday while getting ready for work I was stopped dead in my tracks when the Today show announced a segment about Anita Hill and Justice Clarence Thomas wife Virginia “ Ginny” Thomas. Ginny wanted Anita to apologize for accusing her husband of sexual harassment 19 years ago. I remember the case very well, during that time they were holding senate hearings to vote in Clarence as the new judicial Supreme Court justice.

When vetting a candidate it is not unusual for the FBI to do a complete back ground check on the perspective contender. They speak with past co-workers and other people who can relay professional and personal information about the candidate. Well in Clarence case they stumbled upon Anita and she told them about her experience with Clarence. She was led to believe that her interview would never be made public and this was simply a fact finding mission. However, the senate requested to view all information pertaining to Clarence during his confirmation hearings. Well that is when all hell broke loose.

On the tapes Anita claimed that Clarence sexually harassed her at their place of employment for about 3 years. She referred to specific incidents of Clarence’s behavior, including repeated requests for dates and references to pornographic material. On other occasions she testified he referred to the size of his own penis as being larger than normal and he also spoke on some occasions of the pleasures he had given to women with oral sex. Anita stated she was so stressed out a work, she decided it was better for her mental health to take a job teaching at Oral Roberts University.

Anita was called before the Senate to testify about what happened. I remember watching her on the screen and she looked completely embarrassed most of the time. Meanwhile Clarence simply looked angry, he stated the hearings "a national disgrace...a high-tech lynching for uppity blacks who in any way deign to think for themselves, to do for themselves." I agree that it seemed that the Senate wanted to expose every little nasty detail about his life. It is very rare that the FBI tapes are made public and I am sure a bit of racism was the reason behind it.

Needless to say the Republicans voted Clarence in and he became a Supreme Court Justice and Anita Hill went on with her life. However, many women of all nationalities believed (as I do), that she was telling the truth. In an effort to protect her career decided just to leave her job and keep quiet about the harassment. From that point going forward Clarence had lost all credibility in the black community, he was not considered an ally.


Now 19 years later here comes Ginny (come lately)Thomas calling Anita hill demanding an apology on behalf of her husband. Ginny left a voice message on Anita’s work phone saying…

Good morning, Anita Hill, it's Ginny Thomas,” said the voice. “I just wanted to reach across the airwaves and the years and ask you to consider something. I would love you to consider an apology sometime and some full explanation of why you did what you did with my husband. So give it some thought and certainly pray about this and come to understand why you did what you did. OK, have a good day.”


When Ginny was asked to confirm if she really left the voice mail she said…

I did place a call to Ms. Hill at her office extending an olive branch to her after all these years, in hopes that we could ultimately get past what happened so long ago. That offer still stands, I would be very happy to meet and talk with her if she would be willing to do the same. Certainly no offense was ever intended.”

Anita responded by saying, “I don’t apologize. I have no intention of apologizing, and I stand by my testimony in 1991.”


Anita kept it classy and gave a simple statement. But Mrs. Ginny I’ma say what Anita wanted to say but couldn’t say. Here it goes…


You extending me an olive branch? I don’t give two rat’s azzes about you! Who the f*ck do you think you are ! I ain’t thought about you in 19 years what the f*ck made you believe that I wanted to befriend you! And further more, b*tch don’t call me that that bullshit. I said what I said and I ain’t changing my story. It ain’t my fault that yo man came on to me. You need to check that nigga…not me. And just so you know… hell naw I ain’t sorry nor will I ever apologize. Hoe you got some nerve calling me talking about a muthaf*cking apology, are you f*cking retarded, crazy, outta yo rabbit as mind! See in a minute you gone make me step off this throne and beat yo azz. So you and yo boot licking, uncle tomming azz husband betta leave me the f*ck alone cuz this the last time I’ma speak to you about this. Next time b*tch it’s yo azz. Now run tell that!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Halloween Is Around the Corner... I have the perfect costume for ya

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• Red Bandana
• Black Tank Top
• Antoine's Autographed rolled up paper

Friday, October 8, 2010

The New Definition of Swagger



Roland is now selling ascots. He says on his website that this is the new definition of swagger. Honestly Roland, you look kinda of gay-ish in the picture. I am in no way implying that homosexuals do not have swagger, cuz trust me they do! But I think even they would agree that swagger is not the word we will use for you in the picture above. For god sake’s you have a bloom of a flower in your hand, showing all 32 of yo teef, with a come-hither look in yo eyes. Please talk to your advertising folks cuz this pic doesn’t make a grown ass man purchase an ascot nor does it boost up his swagger.

Simply Magnificent




On my way to sleep last night I heard some fabulous news concerning our Fist Lady Mrs. Michelle Obama. I was drifting off to sleep when the anchor woman said that Michelle Obama had been named by Forbes Magazine as the most influential/powerful woman in the WORLD! It brought a huge smile to my face. I felt very proud and wished I could drop by the white house so I could give her a fist bump.

It made me feel like some one in my family had pushed passed the glass ceiling. Like my big sister had just broken a barrier that left the path wide open for the rest of us. I feel the same way about my other homie Oprah. They both make me want to press harder, go further, reach wider, be uncompromising, and stay the course until I succeed.

I love them both because they are not your typical success story. Both came from blue collar backgrounds and worked hard to succeed in their chosen fields. Neither climbed the letter of success by using their sexuality and both are smart as a whip. Oprah nor Michelle is considered drop dead gorgeous by today’s standards, but they both have a beauty that is so amazing, deep and profound that you can’t help but find them exquisite and admire their loveliness and splendor.


What can I say they are my idols and in my head they are my mentors. I remember interviewing for a job over the phone and I wanted to sound powerful, concise and basically impress the interviewer. I sat down at the kitchen table and put Oprah’s magazine in front of me. I just stared at her cover and said “ Lord if you can do it for her, you can do it for me”. Guess what… I got the job. That is how inspired these women make me feel.


I just want to congratulate First Lady Chelle and say great job. You are a wonderful shining exemplary example of what we all can be if we stay focused and put ourselves in the driver’s seat of our own lives.

Monday, October 4, 2010

35... Are You Serious?



Do I look like I am about to turn 35! I am having the birthday blues and my birthday is less than two months away. Turning 35 should be a reason to celebrate but I feel old. Part of me is happy to see 35 because so many people don’t get a chance, but the other part of me ask what the hell have you been doing for 35 years. I am not happy with my job, I would like to be on more solid ground financially, I am still working on self esteem issues, and I am always working on losing weight. Basically I am not satisfied with myself and I am always finding some way to improve myself. I wonder if this is a lifetime thing.


On a positive note, I got my Essence magazine a few weeks ago and they listed tips on how to further your career. Normally I would look at these things and think how I could integrate them into my life. This time I just glanced at the tips and grunted. I did not create a list of things to buy, ways to improve or even equate it with my life. For me this is a HUGE accomplishment, I use to always look for ways to reinvent myself like the black successful women in the magazine. Well guess what world…. I am not the frigging woman in the magazine….. I am me. Trust me there is no lack of ambition in my life…however if I am going to succeed it will be because of me, not some stupid tip I got out of a magazine.

By now I thought I would have a husband and a few kids. I have neither; I must admit I want the kids more than the husband. I have not found someone that I want to spend the REST of my life with. I am not ashamed of that, I feel it is better to live happily with yourself than to get tied down with someone you don’t really care for. Better yet someone you are trying to create into a better man for you, this seems to be more of the case for me.


But this 35 thing is so bothersome. Hell I remember being 17, 21 and 25 so vividly. Actually it seemed like yesterday and now I feel like the old lady. Since when did I get so concerned about investments, 401k, life insurance and other old folks things.


Now my body requires sleep and will take it if I don’t give it. Just last week I was up studying later than normal, I got about 3.5 hours of sleep. Mannnnnnn I fell asleep at work. I was looking at the computer and the next thing I know my co-worker was shaking me telling me to wake up before I get in trouble.

Things hurt when I get out of bed. To lessen the hurt I am required to stretch. People get on my nerves so quick, my patience is completely gone. I hate to argue it gives me a headache, but I can not tolerance for disrespect. I have gotten into more arguments in the last few years about men disrespecting women then ever.

Oh by the way when did I become a feminist and practice philanthropy. Your priorities sure change with age, don’t they. I just hope I don’t have the blues on December 5th like I did when I turned 30. I sure hope this is just a passing fad

Monday, August 30, 2010

Funny As Hell



Lauren recently performed at Rock The Bells. Celebs and their spouses sat on the side of the stage to check out her set. I swear Chris Rock and Kendu look like Lauren let off a huge nasty wet fart. Their look is classic... it made my day!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Songs That Make My Skin Crawl

I am shocked by the things that are played on the urban radio stations today. It absolutely alarms me the things that are said or implied in the songs the programmers decide to play. What really pisses me off is they don’t even try to play certain songs during school hours or late at night to avoid the ears of young listeners.

One of the songs on my top hated list right now is Ciera’s new song called Ride. Here are a few of the lyrics.

I can do it big
I can do it long
I can do whenever or however
You want

I can do it up and down
I can do it circles
To him I'm a gymnast
This ring is my circus

I market it so good
They can't wait to try I I I I
Me e e a a
I work it so good
Man, these nigga's
Trying to buy I I I I me

They love they way I ride it (x3)
They love the way I ride the beat
How I ride the beat, I ride it


Just imagine your 8 year old daughter/niece/cousin singing this song. Then ask you what is Ciera riding mommy?


Although the next song is a great song I don’t think it should be played during the hours children are listening to the radio. Neighbors Know My Name.


Soon as we get started makin love goin harder hear a... (knock knock) knocking on the wall,
And as soon as I go deep getting it in then again there's a... (knock knock) knocking on the wall,
Girl your legs keep shakin I swear we breakin our new headboard headboard
And the love we make it feels so good girl you know I'm proud lookin in your lovley face scream my name you do it so loud


I bet the neighbors know my name
Way you screamin scratchin yellin,
Bet the neighbors know my name
They be stressin while we sexin,
I bet the neighbors know my name
My name my name
I bet the neighbors know my name



Again this is adult situations and it I just think it’s too much. I do believe in the first amendment and those artists have a right to create the best music they can. However, the PUBLIC radio station may not be the best place to exhibit some of the racier songs.

Janet Jackson has not had a #1 hit since her nipple made an appearance at Super bowl. We are not allowed to see explicit nudity scenes on public television, why then are we allowed to hear them on the radio.

I guess I am just old fashion in some

Monday, August 23, 2010

Pride Before The Fall




Michelle Fonville, an overweight woman who went to get a manicure, pedicure and eyebrow arch at Natural Nails in DeKalb, Georgia, was charged $5 extra because of her weight, reports WSBTV.com.

Fonville shares with the news station: "I was humiliated. I almost cried. Tears were forming in my eyes."

She realized the charges after looking over her bill. Fonville says she thought it was a mistake, until the manager told her she was charged $5 because of her weight.


Salon manager Kim Tran told reporter Eric Philips that the surcharge was due to costly repairs of broken chairs by overweight customers, reports WSBTV.com. Tran explained "the chairs have a weight capacity of 200 pounds and cost $2,500 to fix."

Tran says she shared this message with Fonville. "I didn't want to argue with her about $5. I wanted to make her pleased with her service," Tran said. "I whispered ... I said, 'I'm sorry, next time I cannot take you.'"

All I could think when I read this article is……………Are you serious?

This is pure bullsh*t. There would be no way on God’s green earth that I would ever patronize this business again. Then I would have contacted the news and had that business splashed all over the 10 o’clock. Then I would have got some more of my “fat” homies to help me picket the place and had leaflets to their entire customer on the way in advising them of their discriminatory practices. The store was found on essence.com but this need to get out to more people so fat and skinny chicks alike can let this business know how to properly treat their customer’s.





Read more: http://www.essence.com/news/hot_topics_4/nail_salon_charges_extra_for_overweight.php#ixzz0xS8jXDVC

Monday, August 16, 2010

Michelle's Vacation Scandal






I am running late but I wanted to address an issue concerning our First Lady, Mrs. Obama and her decision to take her daughter Sasha on summer trip to Spain. Before I speak on this issue please read the article below that was printed in the NY Daily News.

From New York Daily News:
Michelle Obama seems more like a modern-day Marie Antoinette – the French queen who spent extravagantly on clothes and jewels without a thought for her subjects’ plight – than an average mother of two … I don’t begrudge anyone rest and relaxation when they work hard. We all need downtime – the First Family included. It’s the extravagance of Michelle Obama’s trip and glitzy destination contrasted with President Obama’s demonization of the rich that smacks of hypocrisy and perpetuates a disconnect between the country and its leaders.

Do you smell that….it seems like someone is preparing a plate of hateration to service the American people. I am sure that the President and his wife are very concerned with the plight of our economic situation. I am certain that they are acutely aware of the financial issues many people in our nation are facing. However, the President and his wife have worked very hard to obtain the financial blessing they enjoy today. Let’s not forget that Lady O was a six figure sistah… out earning her husband for many years of their marriage. This is no run of the mill family that just haphazardly run the presidency. No they are not billionaires but according to their 2009 taxes they are millionaires. Guess what….millionaires take glitzy, expensive and sometimes extravagant vacations. I know I would be sitting in Fiji enjoying some coconut rum and getting a deep tissue massage at this very moment if I was a millionaire. Not to mention that the Obama’s paid for their vacation out of their own pocket. Mrs. Obama took this time to spend with her girlfriends and her girlfriends bought their daughter’s too. I think it’s their money to do what they want to do with it. I don’t see anyone getting upset when Jay-Z and Beyonce travel around the Mediterranean in their yacht or when Warren Buffet decides he wants to spend millions of dollars on purchasing more stock not to mention how many vacations were taken by the previous president. George Busch was the vacation kang (king for you proper folks). In his first 18 months in office, Obama has taken 65 days off. At this point in Bush's first term, he'd taken 120 days off – almost double Obama's total.
Bush was on vacation during the 911 attacks and during Katrina. He did not leave his vacation when Katrina hit N.O.. He also refused to leave his vacation when Palestinians attacked towns in southern Israel in December 2008.

It’s also been stated that the taxpayers had to pay for the secret service to travel with the First Lady and that should not come at the tax payers expense. That’s a joke because all previous presidents have secret service accommodations and I am sure they travel out the country from time to time. Not to mention there is a budget that congress approves for the travel expenses that the POTUS and his family may incur.
I wrote all that to say to all those complaining people, get a life and if you unemployed worry about paying your own damn bills and keep your eyes off of other people’s funds.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Growing Up Too Soon





I remember going through puberty with both dread and excitement. I was super excited when I started getting hair up under my arms. I would show off that I had hair under my arm pits. My cousins were so jealous that I had hair and they did not. Then my boobs started to develop as strangely as it sounds it didn’t even notice. My dad told my mom that he think it was time I started wearing a bra. Without explanation was wearing a sports bra that flatten my chest even more. Then around 12 I started my cycle and was given a pad and shown what to do and that was it. No one spoke to me about sex, womanhood or pregnancy. Then again I was still playing with dolls and watching cartoons every chance I could get, boys were not even on my radar. It was 1987 and things were quite different then compared to now.

However, scientists are reporting that girls are going through puberty at a much earlier age than the girls before their generation. Nearly half of African-American girls start showing signs of puberty by 8 years old, and some American girls are developing as young as 5, even 4 years old, experts say.

As reported by MSNBC News:

The changes in Kiera’s body scared her parents. Though the 8-year-old seemed her usual chipper self, she’d started to develop headaches and acne. More alarming to her mom, Sharon, were the budding breasts on Kiera’s thin little chest.

“I thought, she’s too young,” remembers the Pittsburgh mom. “She’s still fearful about sleeping by herself. An 8-year-old just isn’t mature enough to handle this.”
For Kiera, whose last name is being withheld to protect her privacy, it was all so embarrassing. None of her friends seemed to be experiencing what she was. When they asked about the acne and her expanding chest, Kiera was evasive. “I didn’t want to tell them what was going on,” says the Pittsburgh girl, now age 9. “So I had to kind of lie to them.”

When Kiera’s parents took their daughter to the doctor, he assured them that nothing was wrong with the girl. Kiera was simply starting puberty early.
As it turns out, puberty at age 7 or 8 isn’t so unusual these days. A new study, published Monday in the journal Pediatrics, shows that more American g
The changes in Kiera’s body scared her parents. Though the 8-year-old seemed her usual chipper self, she’d started to develop headaches and acne. More alarming to her mom, Sharon, were the budding breasts on Kiera’s thin little chest.

“I thought, she’s too young,” remembers the Pittsburgh mom. “She’s still fearful about sleeping by herself. An 8-year-old just isn’t mature enough to handle this.”
For Kiera, whose last name is being withheld to protect her privacy, it was all so embarrassing. None of her friends seemed to be experiencing what she was. When they asked about the acne and her expanding chest, Kiera was evasive. “I didn’t want to tell them what was going on,” says the Pittsburgh girl, now age 9. “So I had to kind of lie to them.”

When Kiera’s parents took their daughter to the doctor, he assured them that nothing was wrong with the girl. Kiera was simply starting puberty early.
Personally I feel the exposure to different chemicals in the air and inside our food has girls to mature faster. Back in the 1700s, girls didn’t start to menstruate till they were 17 or 18, Garibaldi says. That had a lot to do with malnutrition. The assumption is that the steady decline in age since then has to do with more abundant food. Now we are shooting our meats up with hormones and dye, we pollute out air and use dangerous chemicals in household products that would kill if used in larger dosages.

Studies have linked an early start to menstruation with an elevated risk of breast cancer. And other research has shown that girls who go through puberty early tend to have lower self-esteem and a poor body image. They are also more likely to engage in risky behaviors which can result in unplanned pregnancies.

I could not imagine having a daughter and trying to tell her about the changing in her body at the age of 8. I also wonder if this will lead to menopause occurring at a younger age. We all know that women are given a set amount of eggs and the sooner we start using them…the sooner they are gone. I think this is something that must be investigated and taken seriously.

.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Need A Mental Health Day

Today I am mentally exhausted. My brain is just not connecting with the work. As a matter of fact I feel like I am miles away from work……actually work is the last thing on my mind. I wish I could go back home get in the bed, cover my head and fall into a deep sleep.

I am starting to really detest my job. I really hate saying that because so many people are without jobs and I do not want to sound ungrateful. But I found that it worse to make good money at a job you hate, than making less at a job you love.

It’s crazy when your young you focus solely on the money and as you get older and wiser other things become more important. Today I am struggling liking my job…it’s too easy and I want to use my brain. Don’t worry I am not complaining out loud at the job, and I damn sure not submitting my walking papers. I guess I will just focus on school and chill out until other doors of opportunity swing open.

Today has been one of those crazy days…. my heel broke on my shoe. I needed more “always” and had to stop and Wal-Mart because I only had one in my purse. I wonder if I am just going through hormonal issues our something. Lately I get upset so easily….the slightest thing send me into a fit of rage. Sometimes I have to tell my self “it’s not that serious, calm down”. Not to mention I have been cussing like a sailor.

School is about to start in two weeks and I have to get my mind back in school mode. I guess I am just full of complaints today. I’m sure things will get better soon.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Being A Black Man

Check out this series about being a black man in America. I thought it was thought provoking an and a good read. Let me know your thoughts


http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/metro/interactives/blackmen/blackmen.html

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Chase Bank Can Kiss My AZZ




If you have read this blog for any length of time you would know that I used to be fiscally irresponsible and this lead to my bankruptcy. Bankruptcy was a very hard and very personal decision of me. Trust me I lost a great deal of material things when I decided to file Chapter 13, but it made me a better more responsible adult. I now understand that a person’s credit is tied directly to their character. However, I do understand that things in life do not always go as planned and even if your intentions are to pay the funds back….. if it’s choosing between eating and paying a bill, let’s face it we EATING!

About two years after my bankruptcy Washington Mutual ( WaMu) was nice enough to give me an unsecured credit card with a decent line of credit. I was so happy to have this credit card that I made a promise to myself to always make the payment. WaMu was the first bank to trust me and give me an opportunity to rebuild my credit. A few years later Chase purchased WaMu and they sent me a bunch of literature promising nothing would change.

This year I made a promise to myself to pay off all my credit card to a zero balance and only use one card as needed. I decided to make that card my Travelocity card because it offered air miles, so it is benefits me. I paid the rest of the credit cards off and was feeling really good about building my credit back to an acceptable score. I am also very thankful of the institutions that helped me get over the bankruptcy blues.


So imagine my surprise when I checked my Chase account (which was paid in FULL and has not had a transaction since April) and the credit line had been reduced to $300.00 ! WTF…. I was livid and confused. The account had never had a late payment and I always paid the bill so I was fit to be tied when I saw the line of credit had decreased.

I promptly called the credit card company and was told by a very RUDE “portfolio manager” that because I filed bankruptcy 4 years ago that I did not fit the standard set by Chase. She stated that Experian was showing a negative account on my bureau and between that and my bankruptcy I did not qualify to have such a high credit limit. I nicely explained to her that I got the card after I filed bankruptcy; she said we have different criteria than WaMu. I then told her that I have been faithfully paying this account on time for three years and have proven that I can handle having a substantial credit line. She nastily told me that the decision was final and I could accept the line of credit or close the account. I then said how the hell JP Morgan Chase get a bail out for 25 BILLION dollars from my tax dollars and say that I am not worth a line of credit. Not to mention the bail out was not used to make new loans….but to purchase more companies! I asked her who I could complain to because this was not acceptable to me. She smugly said, “ the decision in final.” I then said what could be done to increase my credit line, she told me to send in a copy of my pay check stub and proceeded to give me a PO Box in Delaware. Really…. Have you ever heard of anyone sending in a copy of a check stub to a credit card company? I then told her that I did not like the way she was speaking to me. She said I am not speaking to you any kind of way. I told her to close my account because I did not have to be mistreated by the person I pay to give me a line of credit and if I was not deserving of a substantial credit line, they were not deserving of my business. She closed the account and ended the call with a “you have a great day”. You know she said it in way like, I hope I ruined your day and this is my way of giving you the final jab before I let you off the phone.


I was more pissed when I hung up the phone. But I decided to calm down and call back. I called back and I reached a person that sounded delightful as soon as she answer the phone. I told her that I had just been treated rudely by one of her co-workers and I wanted the person’s name so I could include it in my complaint to the company. She said she could not give the person name out but would like to hear what happened so she could elevate to a supervisor. I explained the situation and she was apologetic and asked me some questions about my credit and took my gross pay over the PHONE…. in under 15 minutes my line of credit was restored!


It seems that credit can be given and taken at the discretion of company workers……….NOT your FICO score….NOT your payment history. It makes me really wonder what the underlying reasons could be. Yes I know the country is in a credit crunch but then again Black people have always been in a credit crunch.

Statistic show we pay more to borrow money even when our credit scores are comparable to white people. Lending institutions make more money off of selling black people cars, houses, boats and basically anything we finance because 9 times out of 10 the APR is higher.

Now that my credit line is restored…. I have vowed not to use that credit card. Chase should really watch whom they employ to speak with their customers. It’s sad to see people abuse power, especially when that power has such broad repercussions on others

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Cry Heard Around The World




I’ve finally completed my Chemistry class only to find out that I got a D in the class. Trust me when I tell you I cried like a new born baby when I found out that I had a D. I worked so hard in that class that it felt like I was giving it my call and I deserved at least a C. But honestly I could not remember and regurgitate all the things I learned when it came time for the test. There were times when I would literally have brain freeze. Most of my summer was spent at work, class, and studying. I haven’t attended a chemistry class since 1991, I don’t know what the hell made me think I could take an accelerated chemistry class and pass! I guess I was overconfident, but I really thought I could do it.

Tests were every Tuesday and we covered 2-3 chapters a day. So the test could easily cover 8 chapters and went on for 6 weeks. My problem was I never had time to really let the stuff sink in my brain. The class was Mon-Thurs, 6:00pm-9:20pm and because the class was only 6 weeks the teacher could not spend a great deal of time finely explaining every concept. I tried I really did. But a D was all I could muster.

I cried and even thought about reconsidering going back to school, heck I do have a master’s degree in Human Resources! I called myself dumb, stupid, comprehension smart and conceptually illiterate! Yes I beat myself up.


Then it happened………..God intervened. I went to do some job shadowing at a water treatment facility and was introduced “by chance” to the environmental compliance manager was introduced to me. We chatted pretty easily and I told him I was interested in becoming a civil engineer with an emphasis in environmental sciences. His face lit up and he told me he just finished up his master’s degree with that exact degree. Then I told him about the D situation and how I was starting to question if that was the path for me. He said, “Don’t sweat it……the classes are very hard, and I was no straight A student myself.” He admitted that he really struggled with it because he had no experience with science but he got through it and eventually began to understand it. And as a matter of fact he would be teaching chemistry at one of the junior colleges next year.

He made me feel…normal. I did not feel so stupid anymore, not all scientists were geniuses! With a little patience, studying and non accelerated pace I had a chance at success. So needless to say I will be back in chemistry this fall.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Staying Strong For Granny

My grandmother had a stroke recently and it really has left me in a daze. It seems like I am having a hard time accepting that she is getting older, weaker and more dependant on her children and grandchildren. My grandmother never seemed to age….she is 78 and still does not have one wrinkle! Not even crow’s feet under her eyes. In my eyes she has always been strong, sassy, independent and a fierce fighter for her family.



My Granny does not believe in letting grass grow under her feet. She still worked full time until she had her stroke. She said retirement was not for her…old folks retire and activity was good for the body and brain. So as long as she felt up to it her children (as if they had any say) continued to let her work.


Granny is a country woman born in Yazoo, Mississippi did not believe in going to the doctor. Shoot I’ve seen my grandma “cure” ailments a million times. Got a cold, granny can take some lemon, herbs, cognac and other ingredients and make some “cough syrup” we called a hot toddie. Man… that toddie had you feeling better in within a matter of hours. I’ll never forget the time she “cured” my cousin Lil Mike of asthma! Lil Mike kept having asthma attacks and she was tired of seeing those doctors push large does of medicines and steroids on her great- grandbaby. She called down to Yazoo, got the recipe from her Auntie and she was giving Lil Mike her version of a breathing treatment. It has been years since Lil Mike (who is not so little any more)

But now that Granny is sick who can “cure” the effects of her strokes. Could it be the doctors at the hospital, the pharmaceutical companies, the rehabilitation therapist or her magic herbs and potions? I’m not really sure but I am praying that we find a way to get her back to her old self as soon as possible.

Having to watch my Granny try to talk with slurred speech was heart breaking. It was painful to ask her to repeat herself so many time before my brain finally picked up on what she was trying to say. Her speech pattern is very abnormal and it frustrates her that people have to lean in close to her and really concentrate on what she is trying to say. It has gotten to the point that Granny does not like to talk because she hates that her family and friends can’t always understand what she is trying to say.

I was asked by the nurse if I would like to feed my Granny lunch! The nurse had so much enthusiasm in her voice when she asked me that question, but to be it was just another sign that my Granny was losing more of her independency. Part of me wanted to say no….my Granny is capable of feeding herself she is not a damn baby. But then I looked at her in the bed looking frailer and weaker than I’ve ever seen her in my life and gave the nurse a faint smile while nodding yes.


Shortly after her meal Granny feel asleep and I just kept looking at her praying and hoping that this was not the beginning of the end. I know that if my Granny does not get better anytime soon she will stop fighting for her recovery, she detest being an invalid that much. She is used to being the caretaker not the ill person.

But as difficult as it is to watch her deal with her health problems, I consider it an honor to feed her and help her through these trying moments. I am just having a hard time dealing with the fact that she may not ever be as strong as she used to be.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

No Rest For The Weary

I just wanted to take a moment and say hey. Whew my life seems like a complete whirlwind right now. So many things to do and so little time. Like tomorrow I am taking a day off of work….but don’t get too excited because I for sure won’t be vacationing.

Lets see…. the grass needs to be cut in the front and back of the house. The weeds need to be pulled up along the fence and all that 4th of July trash need to picked up from in front of the house. Not that I popped any fire works or had a cook out at me house…but magically all the fireworks end up in front of my house.


Then I have to study for a test and a final! I cant tell you the last time I watched television. My day is jammed packed and if I could add a few extra hours to the day I most definitely would.

I few things have been going on in STL that has me scratching my head. There seems to be a war between the thugs and the police. Police have been getting shot and thugs have been getting killed, and the police cant always tell the difference between thugs and regular black men.

Seems like every time I get to hear the news the police have killed somebody or somebody tried to kill the police!


Then there is the VA clinic that could have possible infected over a thousand veterans to HIV and Hepatitis . These fools were hand washing their dental equipment instead of placing them inside the mandated cleaning devices. I am sure that there will be a class action suit regarding this foolery. I hope the person in charge gets fired and they person who thought they were doing their job hand washing the tools, they need to get fired too.


So I will post again really soon, until then stay prayerful and safe

Friday, June 18, 2010

2.54cm=1inch

OMG I’ve started school and I must tell you it’s HARD!! Yeah I knew it would be hard but I thought I would slide into the groove of school my taking Fundamentals of Chemistry (FOC). FOC is a 6 week course and man is there a lot to learn in 6 weeks.

I am determined to pass this class even if it is by the skin of my teeth. I really want this engineering degree and know that it will take every brain cell I have to accomplish this goal. Please keep me in your prayers, cause I am going to need it. I am studying like a fool and it takes me longer to get it than some of my classmates.. but I eventually get it. Man sometimes I feel like I've been smoking ganja all my life, because my memory is crappy. Then again I have not used my brain in this capacity for a few years. I just gotta know th cob webbs off my brain.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Jill Scott and Maxwell Concert Review




If you have been reading this blog for any length of time you would know that Jill Scott is one of my closest friends (in my head). Last Saturday Jill and Maxwell graced the city of STL with their great presence. It was a absolutely fabulous show. I enjoyed myself and could not stay in my seat.

The ticket prices were 150.00 for floor seats, 85.00 the next level, 65.00 a little higher up, 45.00 for the slightly elevated seats, and 35.00 for the nose bleed seats.

Guy Torrey opened the show with a lil comedy. He was only on for 15 minutes and I was still looking for my seat and missed him completed. But he got a few laughs from the concert goers so I guess he was acceptable.

After Torrey exited stage right, the stage hands began to set up the stage for Jilly from Philly. Finally her stage was revealed and a REAL band began to play. Jill’s band is called Fat Back Taffy and it is baaaaaaaad! There were horns, guitars, pianos, shadow dancers and background singers. The crowd was on the edge of their seats waiting for Ms. Scott to hit the stage.

Finally Jill came out rocking her fro, oversized glasses, silver sequenced mini dress and silver liquid leggings and wedged heels. Jill took the audience on a journey of emotions; she took us back 10 years ago to her 1st album to her newest stuff. She then showed off the range of her vocal skills by doing a wee bit of opera-ish type sounds. It definitely left me feeling like her voice was an instrument and she was capable tackling the upper ranges.

Babyyyyyy Jill let the STL have it! She had some shadow dancers that left the men (and some women) with their mouths agape and she sang sweet melodies that had people grooving.


Then came Maxwell. First let me start by saying I am not a Maxwell fan. It’s not like I don’t like him, it’s just I never go into his music. But he has awesome showmanship. He elicited audience participation and the ladies were throwing panties at him all night. I soon realized that I did like a few of those Maxwell cuts.

Max had an awesome band too. He had on one of them “skinny” suits and was rocking the stage. Needless to say I was there primarily for Jill, but I thoroughly enjoyed Maxwell as well. He did his thang.


If you get an opportunity to see these two in concert………….GO! I give this event 4 out of 5 stars. Pure showmanship and great quality. If you’re mature enough to remember the Budweiser Superfest then you would love this concert experience.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Sex and the City 2 Review




Last Thursday night my homie Alicia and I went to see Sex and the City 2. It was truly an event and we had a great time. We decided to go to the best theater in STL…..The Moolah. The Moolah has stadium seating and comfy leather love seats and a bar! It also boast the largest screen in the metropolitan area. Needless to say, we had a few cocktails and popcorn and sat back to watch the movie.

In case you’re wondering my fave Sex and the City chick is Miranda. This character reminds me so much of myself. Miranda over thinks everything, very independent and attempts to use logic at all times.

Sex in the City 1 was better than 2, but if you are a cult follower you will absolutely love them both. I wont spoil it for those of you that haven’t seen it yet, but there were some key points that stood out.


1. Miranda and Charlotte coming to the conclusion that being a Mom is not the end all be all of a woman. Both women felt like being a Mom was great….but it was not enough. Miranda quit her job to spend more time with her son and quickly realized that she missed working. Charlotte felt like being a Mom left no time for herself, and she really wanted her me time back. I would probably feel the same way if I were a mother. Being a mother is not the complete sum of every woman. Some of us want our careers, our hobbies, our “me” time and just time to unwind. Mothers should not be made to feel like they are less than a great caregiver because they still want to enjoy their lives and go after their dreams.


2. Carrie and Big decided that they needed time away from each other to keep their marriage healthy. They agreed to spend two days a week away from each other so they can keep the relationship fresh and new. These two days would give Carrie time to hang out with her friends, write her book, shop, stay up late, and do the things she used to do when she was single (outside of cheating). It also have Big time to watch all the television he liked, and all the ESPN and black and white movies he could stand. He could lay on the coach all day in his boxers and smoke as many cigars as he liked. Although this may sound crazy to some, this was what they needed to make it work. Why do we always have to go the conventional traditional way……even when it does not work! What about doing what work for the people in the marriage. Who’s marriage is it anyway and who says that people have to follow tradition?


I give Sex in the City 3.5 stars out of five. This is worth seeing.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

I'm Just Saying







Is it me or does Beyonce look a little pale in the photo on the top. This photo was taken yesterday of her at the Obama’s state dinner. I cant tell you when the other photo was taken. Look likes she called Sammy Sosa and borrowed some of the moisturizer. It makes me think of that quote by Audre Lorde’s, “The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house.”



I’m just saying………..

Please Don’t Test….. That Teacher’s Gansta

I know you have probably seen the video of the teacher Sherri Davis whooping the ass of her student Isaiah Regan. When I saw the video I could tell that the teacher had snapped and had enough of this particular student’s bullshit. Davis appeared on Good Morning America and stated that the day had been "utter chaos." Just moments before the incident where she beat student Isaiah Reagan on video, she had to break up a fight in the hallway between a 16-year-old boy and a 13-year-old girl. She said that people there are not protecting the students or the staff at the school. Ms. Davis said that while her adrenaline was still building from stopping the student fight in the hallway, she heard the door to the classroom slam shut and the door lock. A white girl who was a special needs student who had just enrolled in the school was in the room, surrounded by mostly African-American male students who were "mimicking her." Isaiah Reagins, who she says has assaulted teachers and other students, "was bouncing around in a threatening, bullying position."

Obviously lil Isaiah has been a problem for sometime and still had not learned that school is not a place to act a fool. You may ask yourself how can a teacher go from being teacher of the year (twice) to beating the hell out of one of her students? Well let me answer that for you ….. bad ass kids with poor excuses for parents. If you think your job gets on your nerves try going into the classroom. Oh teaching is not how it use to be when kids respected grown folks and at the threat of calling the parents and/or grandparents was enough to make a child break down into a soggy pile of tears.

I hate to say it…… but we are witnessing what happens when crack babies have children. Yessssss……most of the children causing problems today grandmothers are/were crack heads in the 80’s. Of course this is just my opinion but I really believe that it is true.

I used to be a long term substitute teacher and I had to lay hand on a student too! I remember it like it was yesterday. My student name was Charles and he was very short and little for his age (14). Charles also had sickle cell but he was mad as a muth%$#@!!. One afternoon Charles clowned and talked and gave me the blues so when the end of day bell rang I told Charles he was to stay seated until he could be quiet for a full five minutes. The other children left to catch their buses and Charles was instructed to stay in seat and be quiet. Charles said, “If I miss my bus, it’s gonna be all your fault.” I told Charles every time he spoke his five minutes would start over again, so if he missed the bus it would be his fault. I got up from my desk and stood in front of the door. Needless to say Charles kept talking and I refused to let him leave. At some point he starting cussing and talking about what he was going to do if missed his bus. Then out of no where Charles picked up a desk and threw it at me.


I lost it on his ass! I grabbed that lil muth%$#@!!. by his throat and pushed him against the wall and lifted him off the ground by this throat. I told him, “Let’s get one damn thing clear here….. I ain’t the one to play with and if you ever attempt to hurt me again I will make you wish you ever laid eyes on me. Little did I know the principle saw the entire episode and calmly asked me to release the child. I let him go and he ran out the room. The principle left and went on about his business.


But I tell you what….. Charles was one of my best students after that. I never had a problem out of him again and guess what………he passed my class. We joked, smiled and continued on like what happen that afternoon never took place. Teachers I people too and if tested they make open a can of whoop ass on ya.

Many teachers are put in the position to be security. They have to protect kids from bullies as well as protect themselves. Schools with hundreds of students often have very little security …if any. It gets frustrating constantly trying to deal with behavioral issues and not doing what you were hired and educated to do…..TEACH! The government and states are trying to hold the teachers responsible for the children lack of learning…..but what about all the behavior and external issues that find their way into the classroom and must be dealt with before learning can take place. Now Isaiah mama is filing a law suit against the school and Ms. Davis. My question is…….where the hell was his mama when he was acting a plum damn fool! What was she doing to address her child behavioral issues? Had she ever sought professional help for her child, was there discipline in the home?

Please don’t judge Ms. Davis too hard. I’m sure she regrets ever placing her hand on that child, regardless how bad he was he is still a child. But, if she is to remember he is still a child he needs to remember that she is still an adult. We all make bad judgment calls and decisions in our life. I just hope that Ms. Davis can recover from this professionally and financially. I also hope that Isaiah understands that his behavior was inappropriate and his mother addresses h

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Illinois sheriff using food stamps to track fugitives




CHICAGO -- Fugitives in Cook County are learning that there really is no such thing as a free lunch.

More than 100 people wanted for crimes ranging from kidnapping to marijuana possession were arrested late last month after police tracked their food stamp applications, Cook County Sheriff Tom Dart said Monday.

When people are arrested, they often give authorities addresses that turn out to be vacant lots or abandoned buildings _ but they're more honest when they want food stamps.

"We were able to clear a lot of people off of our wanted list and at the same time get them off of the public dole," Dart said while announcing that 168 fugitives had been arrested during the investigation, most through food stamp tracking. Many applicants had listed their real addresses.

The investigation dubbed "Operation Talon" included Dart's office, the U.S. Department of Agriculture and the U.S. Marshals Service's Great Lakes Regional Fugitive Task Force.

The key was the roster of food stamp recipients contained in the USDA's computers.

After giving the USDA a list of 41,000 people who having arrest warrants pending in Cook County, the agency's computer spit out between 700 and 800 names.

"By working together with them we were able to take data that we normally don't have," said Dart, adding that it's illegal for fugitives to collect food stamps.

It isn't the first time Dart has used creative tactics. His office once lured fugitives to an "event" with a promise of free Super Bowl tickets.

While tracking food stamps, investigators found addresses for people across Cook County, some wanted for violations as minor as failing to appear in traffic court. Some were sound asleep, and none gave police any trouble, authorities said.

"We know where they're at because they're actually collecting checks at those addresses," Dart said.

Some arrests led to other arrests and the seizure of weapons, cocaine, marijuana and ecstasy in the homes they were searching, authorities said.

Among those arrested was a Chicago woman accused of aggravated kidnapping for allegedly locking a woman in a room, wrapping her belt around the woman's neck and forcing her to crawl until she gave her $300 in September 2008.

Other arrests included a Chicago man wanted for allegedly beating a man with his shoe, and a woman accused in January of scratching her name and a man's name into "The Bean," the huge stainless steel sculpture at Millennium Park.

Dart said it's unclear how much food stamp money was going to fugitives, but said some people arrested during the recent sting were wanted on charges from two years ago.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Finding A New Church Home

In 2008 when I returned to St Louis I rejoined my old church. I did everything that I did not do the first time I joined. I attended all the new membership classes and even got re-baptized. My guy loved the church and I enjoyed the church too. One of the reasons that I enjoyed the church so much was the pastor. The pastor was great; he seemed in tune with the struggles of his congregation and was very relatable. At first, I was going pretty regularly. I was going to bible study and Sunday service….then things changed.

My guy kept asking me to go back and I just really did not want to go. People would ask me what was wrong and I could not put my finger on it. In addition to feeling a little put off by the church, my relationship with God was slipping as well. We all know that this could’ve been a combustible combination. I spoke with a few people about how I was feeling about my relationship with God and how I was worried that I could not feel his presence as strong as I once did.

People kept telling to go to church, but I did not feel that attending church was the answer. It took awhile but finally I started to feel my connection with God grow stronger. I then was faced with the task of going back to church. However, I did not want to go to the church I joined. I visited a few churches but still did not feel compelled to go back to my home church.


It has been well over a year since I been back to my home church and just the other day it hit me like a ton of bricks why I did not want to go back. I literally just got an answer this weekend and I finally feel like a burden as been lifted from my shoulders.

The reason I felt so strongly about not attending was related to the people in the church. Again, I absolutely love the pastor and believe that he is a God sent….. but many others are not ( to me that is). I remember when I first started going to that church I was tore up on the inside. I was spiritually dead and desperately needed reviving. I am an extremely private person and did not feel comfortable sharing my problems with the ministers at the church. I would pray every time I entered the church that someone could see into my spirit and pray for me, touch me, hold my hand …something. My brother and nephew had died and I was suicidal…but no one knew it. I just prayed that someone would see my pain. Needless to say no one ever noticed me or my pain. But I survived.



I’ve since grown a little wiser and had the opportunity to attend other churches. When I lived in Cali I attended a multi-racial church and loved it. It was wonderful seeing different races praise God with one voice and being treated like a sister in Christ by everyone was a feeling I’ll never forget.

There were ministries to fit every need a person could have, and there were many ministries to my personal need. I joined a small group of women (no more than 8 women) and we did a series of bible studies. These women were from all income levels and racial backgrounds. They prayed for me and allowed me to vent if I wanted. I never felt like I was a traitor of God because my faith was not always as strong and I did not always stay on path. But I always knew if I kept coming I would eventually get the spiritual feeding I needed. The leader of the group even gave me her number in case I need to talk to her over the phone or I just wanted someone to pray with.


When I came home to STL I went back to my old church. I was familiar with a few members and I always loved the pastor so it was a no brainer. However, this time I felt that the word was flat. There was a great deal of story telling and a lil bit of word and yall know when the devil is on the back of your heels you need some word….stories won’t due!


I wasn’t spiritually broken this time but it still felt like some (not all) the arm bearers of the church did not have spiritual eyes. I just did not feel connected to the church anymore. I kept going and each time I could not wait to get out of the building. I just not sure what I am going to do at this point, but I really desire to settle back into the groove of going to church to get fed and worship with other believers.


I don’t know if I’ve just evolved or if I need to just move on and pray for the best.

Pressing My Way Through




Hey Friends and Family,

Yesterday I was in one of those fucked up moods. I tried to fight it all day, but the urge to slap the shit out of someone just keep coming up to the surface. I admit it I am a woman filled with contradictions one minute I can be cussing and the next minute you may catch me in the corner with my eyes closed saying a lil prayer. I’ve tried to change but what can I say…it is what it is.


Anyhow this urge to slap the shit outta someone started last Saturday. Man it rained like cats and dogs and the tornado horns when off and directed everyone to go to the basement. I went to the basement as directed and once I felt it was safe I came back up to find that water was leaking from the light fixtures of my home.

My pisstivity level went up a notch or two. Let me refresh y’all memory, the seller of my home told me I had a new roof and all the supporting documents I have on the home says the roof is new. Long story short I filed a claim to sue the seller. Once she realized that I was in the process of suing her she decided to call me. This heifer begged me to work it outside the courtroom. Me….being the nice, considerate, compassionate and down to earth sistah that I am was cool with handling this issue like grown women. Home girl kept saying she was getting estimates and that someone would call me. Then she would say that she would have some one over to deliver the bid to me so I can go over it. I would press her more then she would say that the contractor would start on the house next week. Well that bullshit when on for over a month. Once the court date went by I never heard from that heifer again.

See when some people look at me or speak to me they think I am one polished and refined lady. What they don’t know is underneath that sophistication is straight hood! I’m like Colt 45…..Don’t let the smooth taste fool ya!

I decided that I needed to take care of my roof and handle old girl later. Needless to say I will be short a few grand so I can get my roof replaced. For her sake I hope she don’t think this is over, if anything this is just the beginning. I am done talking and playing Mrs. Nice Girl, the gloves are coming off.

Today I feel a little better but not by much. Then the job situation is getting on my last nerve. The entire department is sitting around looking at each other all day wondering when something is going to go down. But, the boss is still saying everything is going to be okay and no job losses will occur, work should start to pick up next week. So until then I guess I have to keep sharing natural hair tips with my co-workers and surfing the internet for gossip.

My life seems so complicated right now… I am just trying to stay focus and concentrate only on the things I can fix. I try to ignore the rest but it is extremely hard to do. This is one of those times I need to remember the serenity prayer and it keep pushing.