T.G.I.F

Hey People,


Today I’m tired as hell. I was on the phone all night with my home girl from Orlando. She is trying to convince me to move to FL, needless to say I am not interested, there’s not much difference been FL and CA so that’s defiantly a no go. With that said, y’all know I didn’t get my exercise on this morning, I barley made it to work, I thought about calling in because I was just tired and really not feeling it, but I called in last Friday, so I had to woman up and come in to work.

So then I get here and hafta listen to my co-worker blab on and on about her damn baby and how she reacted to her booster shots yesterday. You would think people get the non verbal queues (like when I start to yawn, or roll my eyes up in my head) that I just don’t give a damn about your kid or you right now. If you thinking I’m in a bad mood then you would be right. It’s rent time and at the first of the month I get real pissy cause I gotta pay this high ass rent and the sh*t just makes a sistah straight mad. Plus, I purchased my plane ticket to go back to STL for Christmas and the lowest fair was with crappy Southwest. I absolutely totally extremely dislike flying with Frontier and Southwest because the flights are usually packed to full capacity. I’m always seated next to an arm rest hogger, snorer, people with babies, or people that love to talk to people they don’t know. But, what’s a sistah to do when all the other airlines are charging between $415.00 and $550.00 for a round trip ticket from LA to STL. Southwest here I come, just have my Grey Goose and tonic ready cause I’ma need about four of those jokers. I want to be knocked the f*ck out for the entire flight, that way I won’t give a damn about what kid is screaming and who is snoring.
Since y’all already know I’m in a bitchy mood I’d like to talk about my co-workers some more. Why the hell do some people on the same level as you, at some point try to become the designated boss? Ya know how they do it, the boss misses a day of work and the suck up tries to regulate what everyone is doing and assigns herself boss for the day. That’s they type of sh*t I’m dealing with today, and home girl is about to get the business. I am a consummate professional, but when people try to play me or treat me substandard the hood just jumps right out of me, and I wind up saying things like “ho go sit yo ass down sum where.” That usually gets them off my back and avoiding me for the rest of the day. Well I’ll holla at y’all on Monday, hopefully I won’t be in a meeting with HR because I got a feeling Ms. Co-worker is about to get a verbal beat down.

Here We Go Again

My good friend Felicia recently emailed me the story about Bill O’Reilly and the comments he recently made on his radio show. Yes some of his comments were stupid and ill-mannered but is it worth giving this a great deal of time and thought….. eh no. Bill is quoted as saying,

“And I couldn’t get over the fact that there was no difference between Sylvia’s restaurant and any other restaurant in New York City. I mean, it was exactly the same, even though it’s run by blacks, primarily black patronship. There wasn’t one person in Sylvia’s who was screaming, “M-Fer, I want more iced tea.”


Yes this was a very unintelligent comment for someone who considers himself a journalist. However, it also shows his limited exposure to successful, home trained, educated, and articulate black people. Many white people only get exposure black people outside of work on BET or MTV. Come on people don’t get your panties in a bunch, y’all know that we are portrayed as buffoons, whores, oversexed, dope fiends, drug dealers, on welfare, and basically just taking up space. Other races have become desensitized to the violence perpetrated against us, and think that all we do is complain.


I am not saying that Bill O’Reilly’s perception of Black America is correct but he is not alone in his inaccurate assessment, a great deal of other non black people feel the same way, only he has enough balls to say it. People all I am saying is that as a race we allow Corporate America and the government to shape the perception of Black Americans. We can not blame people for the way they feel about black people. To be honest there are times when I have negative feelings and thoughts towards other ethnicities, and that’s my ignorance. However, I feel this is just a ploy to take our attention away from Jena 6, Genarlow Wilson, and the woman tortured in West VA. However, some people are growing tired of being America’s step children and actually taking some action. Recently more than 500 people demonstrated peacefully outside the Northwest Washington home of Debra Lee, Black Entertainment Television's chief executive, yesterday afternoon, demanding that the network stop airing what they call demeaning and offensive portrayals of African Americans.


This is an excerpt of an email the reflects how my friend’s associate feel about the situation

I’m not a fan of this guy, and I detest him! However, he does make some good points and I see nothing racist about the interview. O’Reilly’s comments reflect the stereo-type that’s being packaged and marketed with the help of black folks who continue to consume, support and label such negative images of black folks as black culture, and when confronted about it, we are quick to say it’s just entertainment, when to the white boys, and the outside world it’s not just entertainment, but what they see as who black folks are. I have white friends who are just as surprised as Oreilly when I take them to an all black events where they don’t see the “BET” or VH1 images of black folks. They are actually surprised to see articulate black folks discussing issues such as investments, financial planning, international diplomacy, trade, domestic and international politics, etc. These white folks are surprised because they don’t often see such images of black folks on BET or VH1!!!!

When I talk to my young African cousins in Africa, many of them think the “N” word means to be gangsta or hard-core, or some sort of positive connotation. When I ask them why they think so, the first thing they say is that they got it from the rap videos, and plus they think because the rappers use it to refer to each other, it must be a good thing. The same goes for other foreigners as well. A majority of these people are completely clueless to the facts that this word was once used, and still used to subject, degrade, and mentally assault the minds of many blacks into believing that they were inferior.

The band was excellent, but they were dressed in tuxedoes, and this is what white America doesn’t know, particularly people who don’t have a lot of interaction with black Americans. They think that the culture is dominated by Twista, Ludacris, and Snoop Dogg.

Why blame Oreilly for such a comment? America is almost as segregated as it was during jim crowe, and most white Americans rarely interact with blacks, so what they see or know of black folks comes from the mass media. This is why it is so important that we demand better when it comes to programming that is meant for domestic and international consumption. What do we expect when we mis-use mass media to market ourselves world wide as hypersexual, aggressive, incomprehensible loud mouths, simpletons? What do we expect? Ofcourse we all know that this image of “black folks” is a minority of the black population, but thanks to the power of the mass media, we continue to indoctrinate not just the black youth, but white folks as well to buying into such rubbish by calling it just entertainment.

O’REILLY: Because the young, white kids don’t have to struggle out of the ghetto.
This is a very good point. We must understand that as sad as it is, there are two sets of standards when it comes to black folks and white folks in this country. A white man who commits and felony is more likely to get a job than a black man who commits a misdemeanor.

Big Girls Unite

As I’ve state previously I have never been a small woman and I have no problems with that. (neither have the men that I’ve bedded ). But I must admit that when I picked up my Glamour magazine and saw what they did to America I was pissed. So many companies in the beauty industry claim that women are beautiful in all shapes and sizes, but when it’s time to show and prove they fail miserably. For example, I recently went to a major department store to get some more “work” clothes and of course I saw many things that I liked, but not in my size. Everything cute only went up to a size 10, which is cool if you’re a size 10, but if not you’ll be directed to the “plus” side of the store. Upon entering the “plus” side I noticed there were a few cute things but nothing like the “regular” side. I had to really take my time, do some mixing and matching, try on few things and eventually I settled on a few pieces. Yes I said settled because I was not particularly elated with my purchases, but they would do. So look here fashion industry, we big girls want to have just as many options as the thin women. I want to walk in the store and be able to eye my pieces from across the room. My time is precious boo, I got other thangs I could be doing like getting a pedicure, a massage or watching my man Idris Elba on the Wire. What I don’t want to do is to look at rack after rack of clothing hoping to find something that I like. And I don’t want to always retreat to the “fat” stores to find something in my damn size. It has been my experience as a pleasantly plump woman that if I see something that looks good and the price is right, to buy it right then and there because it might not be there on payday. Don’t be fooled people we big girls like to look good too! Ask my girl Angie she stays looking fresh to death, or my girl Rashida she stay on her fashion game. Although I like some things in LB (Lane Bryant) most of that stuff is just plain ole overpriced, and if you wait you can catch most of it on sale in about 30-60 days. One of the problems that I have with LB is those damn Vanezia jeans. Please tell me what is so damn special about these jeans that they run between $50.00-$68.00 dollars, then if you think that is pricey for a pair of generic jeans they have some that they consider their top self brand call Seven7 jeans and these can run up to $95.00 more. WTF!!!!! Come on now, this is not Macy’s. Nordstrom’s, Dillard or Sears for that matter. But if you can afford it and it looks good on you, then don’t let Black Doll steer you wrong, they are just a bit pricey for me. I rarely wear jeans so to spend a great deal of money on them would be foolish for me. Oh just to let you skinny sistah know, we big girls can rock the same fashion styles as you, and look damn good doing it (hey I do it errrr-day). Check out JHud looking fabulous in her “skinny’ girl dress. Work-em Jen .

Starting Some Mess

Happy Monday People,


Sorry for the lack of post, Friday I needed to take a mental day off. Part of it was due to hair issues. Ladies y’all know what I’m talking about, you got the fly gear and your shoe game is tight, but ya damn hair looks like you’ve been electrocuted or worst you had a great hair style that really needs to be taken down (like some nappy braids) . Whatever the reason my money was kinda funny this week and I was tired of wrestling with wigs and hair pieces so I just needed to take a 3day weekend and look crazy at home.


While I was at home I started some sh*t with the roommates. In case y’all didn’t know both my roommates are white and in most cases it’s cool, but sometimes I excuse myself from the conversation, cause as my friends says I’m quick to go all sistah sistah , power to the people on folks ( especially white folks). Anyway, Friday I was in the mood for head games, plus I wanted to know how my roommates felt about the situation in Jena, LA. We were all in the living room and I turned the T.V. on CNN and they were talking about the rally. So I said, “Y’all heard what’s going on in Jena.” The cool roommate said “Yeah that doesn’t make any sense.” I really didn’t know what she meant by this comment but I didn’t respond right away because the ignorant roommate was quick to say, “ Everyone keeps losing sight of the fact that those boys injured another boy really bad, and Rev AL and Jessie Jackson are quick to get involved and stray away from the facts.” So you know me I was like “Ole boy got his ass whooped don’t get me wrong, but he was calling those young men niggers and other racially charged names so he should have known it was a possibility that he was gone get that butt spanked. Plus he went to a school game after he left the hospital so he was not THAT injured. (In my old neighborhood a real ass whooping consisted of a short stay in the hospital, you might hafta run to see a dentist, get a few stitches, and get some coco butter for the bruises. Then you had to stay in the house for at least a week to wait for the embarrassment factor to wear down, ya dig) Then the cool roommate (who is a teacher) was like “Yes, they got in a fight but those kids should not be charged with attempted murder. I was cracking up, it was a white on white argument and I was luving it. The cool roommate went on to say that white people keep focusing on the ass beating and not the charges, and the fact that the black kids were arrested and the white kids just got a slap on the wrist. Ole girl was ready to go into a war of words with my other roommate, and the ignorant one just retreated back into the kitchen and shut the hell up. I felt like Flavor Flav ( Yeaaaaah Boyeeee). Shout out to all my people that went to Jena to the rally, those that wore black on Thursday and those who sent up a prayer. I am sure it was all needed and appreciated.

Fight the Power

Hey everyone my people made me soooo proud this morning. We went down to Jena and let them know we are not having it. Y’all know black people don’t play about their babies. But on a serious note, it’s time that we start holding on to our kids and let them know that simple mistakes can cost them their lives. I for one am tired of seeing so many black men go to jail, leaving behind broken families. Rallying for justice is great, but we must work to keep our children out of the justice system period! Even in my own family I have lost people to jail and to death due to poor choices and stupid mistakes. I would love to see the day when there are more black men in college than in jail, the day when marriage is a standard in the black community or when more black men become head of the house. This rally in Jena says that we as a community are tired, tired of the same ole, same ole, sitting in courts watching the judge sentence our boys with inadequate representation, or burying our kids way too young.

As I watched the thousands of black people match and chant “black power” I was so proud. I am sure that the Jena 6 thanked God that so many cared enough to protest on their behalf. However, the white people in the town still did not get it. CNN interviewed several white people in the town and they all claimed there was no racism in their town. Many said that it was outside people painting a distorted view of their town. It angered me that these people did not see the injustice in their judicial system. Now, don’t get me wrong I do believe that the boys should be punished for the fight, but the punishment should fit the crime.
I was amazed that so many people went to the area where the “white tree” once existed just to feel the dirt and show solidarity. I was a bit upset that CNN was the only major news show documenting this monumental moment in history. I kept flipping from CNN to Today to Good Morning America, to the Early Show and only CNN kept talking about the rally in Jena. It seemed that every other channel was consumed with O.J. and the Goldman/Brown family. It was if they were saying this is not even news worthy or putting up the middle finger to Black America. But that is okay because we are not doing this for media coverage we are sending a message that enough is enough. I have a correspondent in Jena and she will be updating me momentarily and I will update the post as more information beco

There's a thin line between "THICK" and FAT

I've never been a skinny person, I was a self described "thick" girl. But along the way the lines between thick and fat got really blurry. When I was lonely, depressed, happy or sad I ate. In my teens and early twenties I could eat whatever I wanted, however during the late twenties the weight started to stick. This was not a problem for me because most of my friends were bonified "thick" chicks. Plus gaining weight had a small advantage…..more booty. Contrary to that, not only did I get extra booty, I got extra stomachs, a pound of back fat, bigger breast, and stretch marks came with the territory as well. In four years my destructive eating led me to gain more than 75 lbs, that is about 18.7 lbs a year. Crazy me, I still thought I was phyne and thick, kinda like a crack head looking in the mirror after losing 80lbs and still thinking she is the prom queen. After moving to the West Coast I went back home for Christmas last year still thinking I was phyne. Needless to say, that thought did not last long, everybody kept saying "damn you big", "what chu been eating", and the straw that broke the camels back "are you pregnant?". Oh my gosh, could it be I was actually fat. Yes I went from 149 to 224 but I was still thick right? Here I was living in my own delusional world thinking I was thick when I was just plain ole FAT.

After getting teased relentlessly by family and friends, I had a self intervention. I asked myself what is thick and what is fat. For me thick is someone that still had a shape and had meat on her bones. Thick chicks were healthy and did not use food for comfort. My doctor advised me I had high cholesterol, was on the verge of diabetes, and my blood pressure was on the rise. I realized I was not thick and immediately joined Jenny Craig. I was determined to lose at least 45lbs in a year. Guess what y'all I have lost 27lbs; I need to lose additinal 18 lbs by Dec 22nd. I can't lie, losing this weight has been hard. Most of the time I do not feel like working out, and all this healthy food are expensive. I no longer eat for comfort, but I do still eat my brownies from time to time. My back fat (back cleavage as I call it) and my gut is getting smaller. I feel so much better, I have energy and I can breathe (no more snoring)... yay. I am so excited to be finally getting back into old clothes and going to the mall again... I am starting to feel like me again and I luv it.


Side note…. I am trying to let my hair grow out. I decided not to perm my hair anymore, by wearing braids, my afro puff or wigs. I love wearing my hair in a natural hair in an afro puff. It takes no time to get ready , a little conditioner and Optimal Care moisturizer and I’m good. Well I went to the beauty supply last week and saw this cute wig, and had to have it. Sunday I washed my hair and plaited it up so it would be flat under my new wig. I was okay on Monday because it was a bit cooler, oh but today is another story. It’s kinda hot today, and my head is on fire and itchy. I keep running in the bathroom stall taking off my wig and scratching my head. Whew, this is more than I anticipated, I don’t know how Beyonce does it, these wigs are nerve-racking. I guess tonight I will retire the wig and put my hair back into the afro ponytail. I thought I was gonna be able to switch it up while my hair grew out but I may need to rethink how I wanna handle this situation. I gotta go y’all my head is itching hella bad.

Calling It How I See It

People seem to be amazed at all the hatred and prejudice that still exist in America. But come on, really are we as a community really shocked at the racial intolerance lurking under the surface of America. The United States has been touted as “the melting pot” of the world, filled with opportunities as far as the eye can see. My response to that is yeah right. Although many people don’t see themselves as blatant racist, I know that I’m a racist. Yes I said it, I am a racist born and bred in America. Most of my life I’ve lived in the Mid-West, where racial segregation is accepted and white is often considered right. While I know all white people are not horrible people, I’ve been taught to secretly hate them and be on the look out for mistreatment. In my neighborhood white people were suspects, they were either 5-0, undercover cops, Politian’s, reporters or developers. It has never been said but I was subconsciously taught that when I am on an interview or handling important business it is always a good practice to “sound white”. I am not just talking about speaking correct English, I am referring to a change in the tone of the voice. Let’s face it, most of us have been taught to fear or hate other races and ethnicities. It has been entrenched in the minds of black people that discrimination is not an “if” thing, it’s a “when” thing. Discrimination is viewed as a semi- accepted practice that will enviably occur to every black person no matter how miniscule. Because of this we often are not shocked by the racial imbalance that is so deeply rooted in the culture of our country. The situation in Jena, LA is very extreme and racism often does not present itself in such a cut and dry way. However, what about the disparity in education based on the location of the school , the lack of consistent police presence in high crime areas, or the abundance of community services in areas that produce high tax dollars. These discrepancies of services represent racial discrimination based on financial class. Think of one place where racial discrimination does not exist , if you were thinking the church think again and read the following obtained from the South Carolina Gazette…



Three white men who recently performed at a Gaston County church function dressed in “blackface” while they pantomimed traditional black hymns did so to honor gospel music history, said the pastor of Pilgrim Baptist Church. “It was in no way making fun,” said Thomas Holbrooks Jr., pastor of the church on Beaty Road. “Lord knows we love the old spirituals they sing. That’s why they did it.”


Local black leaders, including Gaston County NAACP president Clyde Walker and David Moore, said members of Pilgrim Baptist should have celebrated black gospel music without wearing black makeup. “I have no problem with anyone that wants to sing black music, but to pretend that you’re a black person when you’re not a black person seems to be more of a mockery than a celebration,” said Moore, who is the president of the Gaston County Organization for Community Concerns. The organization is a non-profit working to improve the quality of life for local minorities.
Stephen York, a South Carolina resident who attends Pilgrim Baptist and used to teach school there, said he dressed in overalls, a flannel shirt and painted his face black as part of a skit for the church’s Mother-Daughter Banquet on the weekend before Mother’s Day. The group lip-synched to prerecorded hymns performed by black singers.


Teresa Holbrooks, the pastor’s wife, said church members were told to dress like Americans in the 19th century for the Mother’s Day event. The program also included other members of the church lip-synching with gospel music by white artists including Loretta Lynn and Randy Travis. She said the black face costumes were her idea. “A little tiny blonde woman sang Randy Travis. So I guess Randy Travis should be offended,” Teresa Holbrooks said. “My husband pantomimed playing the piano. So I guess the piano should be offended.”


So my theory is we all can use a little racial adjustment. Black people are not going back to Africa, White people are not going back to Europe, Mexicans are not going back to Mexico and basically we are all here to stay. I am working on my racial issues by attending a multi-racial church and I also have a white roommate. Although I sometimes refer to white people as “crackers”, “honkeys” and other colorful epithets, I do desire to know them better. In a later post I will be addressing what I am learning about the Caucasian culture and if or how my views are changing. I am hoping that by going to church and praising God with different ethnicities will help me see people as just people and not this group or that group. It is my plan to really try and change those charter flaws that does not allow me to grow in a way that is not pleasing to God. Understand, I will still be me, but a better me. I am not trying to be a “holy roller” or a religion fanatic , but I do want to be a person of good charter and integrity. This will surely be an exciting and hilarious journey so stay tuned. Also on another note , I have a correspondent going to the Jena 6 rally so look forward to a post about that as well.

Living in New Jack City

The apartment above in “Crenshaw Village” retails at $720.00 a month. This is a studio apartment (only 120 square feet) in Los Angeles. Most of my life I have lived in Saint Louis, MO, where a nice two bedroom apartment in a great neighborhood usually runs between $600.00-$900.00. As a matter of fact, my three bedroom house w/ finished basement, 1.5 bathrooms, and very large backyard cost 675.00 a month. I gave all that up to explore career options on the west coast. What I didn’t expect was the huge increase in rental cost. Anyone that lives on either coast can attest to the high cost of rental properties. When I first moved to LA I knew I wanted to live close to the beach, in a great neighborhood, near the mountains and canyons. However, the costs of these properties are astronomical so getting a roommate was my only option (unless I wanted to live in Watts). I love my apartment but do I think a two bedroom is worth $1796.00…. HELL NO. That is one of my complaints about living in Cali, a good chunk of my income goes towards housing. I often wonder how people like housekeepers, fast food workers and cashiers live. I make pretty good money and still have to budget to do simple things like shop and go out with friends, so I can only image the how they make a dolla outta fifteen cents.


On both coasts of the United States, and many cities in between, hundreds of thousands of renters face comparable plights. The home mortgage crisis has received far more notice, but experts say the ranks of renters with dire housing problems are growing faster than the ranks of defaulting homeowners.
The Center for Housing Policy reports that the number of working-family renters paying more than half their income for housing has soared from 1 million to 2.1 million since 1997. Overall, advocacy groups say there are 9 million low-income renter households and only 6.2 million units they can reasonably afford.
In my opinion if you make less than $70,000 per year and live on the coast you should automatically qualify for section 8. A single person living on the coast would has to make at least $100,000 to live comfortably without too many financial worries. This housing crunch can even determine if and when children are born, because if you are single and can barely keep a roof over your head what the hell you gone do with some kids! I guess that is why all these people keep getting boo’d up with each other. Cause, it’s gone take at least two incomes to make it in the east, west, and some parts of the south. There are so many people (at least in LA) that have never lived on their own. My current roommate is almost 40 and has never lived in an apartment by herself. Many people (like myself) find themselves in a boomtown that thrives economically due major corporations offering great jobs and possible career advancement. However, during the time while you’re trying to “advance” you’re stuck in financial hell. Tryna make a come up can be hard on the pockets. Until then I guess I will just keep begging my friend to move down here so I can share her section 8 with her, if that happens maybe I can finally get that BMW 700 series…… ain’t that a shame.
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Focus on Something That Matters

Kim leaves Diddy…..

Usher marries Tameka……

Brittany flops at the VMA’s…..

Foxy to spend 1 year in jail….

Jay-Z is the cash king of hip-hop…

Halle Berry finally preggers…..


The previous headlines have been the topic of discussion for the last two weeks. While it is fun to hear interesting tid-bits regarding our favorite entertainers, as a society we focus way too much on the lives of celebrities. As I’ve stated in a previous post I love gossip (trying to break the habit), but there are times when I could care less about people with multi-millions and what they do in their past time. Besides, there are real situations around the world that could use our attention and focus, possibly changing the way things are dealt with in the United States.


We all know that when a black child goes missing there is very little, if any attention provided in the media. When was the last time you saw an Amber Alert for a black child. Unfortunately, when a black child is missing based on statistics police will have a harder time recovering the child compared to their white counter parts. Each year, there are 58,000 non-family child abductions and of those 42 percent are African-American, according to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. In many cases when white children go missing their families have the money to hire private investigators, open up tip lines, and the power to hold press conferences. Sadly, when our black babies go missing we do not have the resources or the influence to generate massive attention to help bring our children home. When the police have given up and the case goes cold black families are often left alone to find their own children. Please visit the following URL and actually look at these kids. They deserve our attention as much as Diddy or Ms. Berry, you never know you may able to reunite a child with their family. http://www.essence.com/essence/lifestyle/voices/0,16109,1648448,00.html


Jena 6


I know many bloggers have dedicated time to the Jena 6 plight. However, if you’ve been living under a rock and not familiar with the case please visit http://www.countercurrents.org/woodward120707.htm this site will provide you with background information on the issue. For those of you in the know, I want to know what, if anything are you gonna do about this? Will you continue to read about unfair treatment and circumstances of others and think “ Damn, I can’t believe that is stilling happening in this day and age” or will you actively participate in causing a change. Yes I know that we are all glad that Halle finally got her a baby, but guess what real people just don’t give a damn about Halle or her baby. How about paying attention to some kids that’s about to lose their life to the system based on pure bullsh*t. How about evoking some action instead of careless head shakes, or thinking it could never happen in your city. Because guess what, it’s already happened in your city. How many black young men you know are locked up an extensive amount of time for crimes that white people commit and receive lesser or suspended sentences? If you can not make it to the rally please at least wear black on September 20th,



On September 20, 2007 more than 1 million people will wear BLACK as we unite in one voice with one message to declare that UN-EQUAL JUSTICE is just not acceptable. The world will be watching when not just African Americans but people of all races take a stand for something that we all believe in. Mychal Bell and the Jena Six should be free. If you have not heard about their case and why these average teenagers, good students, great athletes and are now fighting for their lives (one student Mychal Bell has been in jail since Dec. 2006) please CLICK HERE NOW to view this video for the shock of your life and on any of the links below for more information. This is clearly a case of racism, but Michael Baisden reminds us the protest in Jena, LA, the US and around the world is not an attack on white people but against a system that has failed us all. It is not about black and white but about what is wrong and what is right!
Enough is Enough...Un-Equal Justice is just not acceptable! ..Wear Black on September 20th to show your support!


RALLY & MARCH FOR PEACE AND JUSTICE

DATE: SEPTEMBER 20, 2007 LOCATION: JENA, LAWHAT TO WEAR: BLACKSCHEDULE:* --- 7:00am Protesters assemble at Ward 10 Recreation Park---
7:30am March to the steps of the LaSalle Parish Courthouse---
8:00am Prayers / Speakers front of the Courthouse--- 9:00am Sentencing for Mychal Bell--- 11:00am March to Park / Rally in Support of Mychal Bell & the Jena 6---
2:00pm Adjournment --- 4:00pm Town Hall Meeting on "Quality Education without Fear or Intimidation" C-Span* Schedule is tentative and subject to change based on sentencing time

Remembering 9/11

Today marks the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks and for me it’s still a bit sad. That day in 2001 was a very very bad day for me to begin with because I got laid off that morning. I had just purchased my first house and bought a new car. My boss called me to his office and told me today would be my last day. This was one of my first jobs out of college and I enjoyed my new lifestyle. I spent money like it was growing on trees, thinking I would have plenty of time to start my savings account. I left work early because I needed to go home to thank and drank. I needed to figure out how I was gonna make the next mortgage and car payment, cause I was living check to check. I kept a bottle of cognac in the freezer for those days that required de-stressing and an altered state of reality. After sitting on my couch getting smashed I went into my bedroom to lie down and turned on the television as background noise. As I drifted off to sleep I heard that planes hit the World Trade Center and the planes had been hijacked. Due to excessive amounts of alcohol consumption when I woke up I thought it was all a bad dream. Oh how I wish it just a bad dream, when I discovered that I had not dreamt the attacks but it really happened I was glued to the TV for three days straight (remember no job) and I kept crying and praying, praying and crying (with occasional trips to the liquor store, because I was not ready to accept the attack on America AND my job loss). I was an emotional wreck yet I could not stop watching the news coverage. Watching those people searching for family members, people jumping out of the tower windows, survivors covered in ash I felt like I was right there suffering with them. It felt like my family had been personally attacked and my heart was heavy with grief. In three days I had become a drunk who was depressed over the loss of my job and 9/11. On the fourth day my cousin thought it was best to come over and pry the Courvoisier out of my hands and get me out the house. I was so happy when Busch said we were going after the terrorists that attacked our country. At the time I thought it was a good decision, because I was ready to open a can of whoop ass on them mofos. In spite of this, I never thought in a million years that we would still be fighting this war, in a country that did not attack us, and killing a man that had nothing to do with the attack on American lives. (I’ll save that rant for another day)

I would like this whole 9/11 situation to come full circle, I got a new job and gave up drinking Courvoisier, now all we gotta do is bring the troops home. Let’s never forget the brave people that lost their lives on 9/11.

My Secret Addiction

I have a confession to make. I am a person that loves to gossip. When my girlfriends tell me that they have some juicy news I get really excited and often interject my opinions before they are through with the story. Gossip is my heroin, other people’s business is my crack and spreading gossip is my meth. Recently, I started gossiping about “family business” with my cousin and it really went too far. Have you ever gossiped with someone and they took it to another level? For example just straight dogging the person like they ain’t sh*t and that was really not what you were going for. I mean it just got real nasty and I really didn’t like how she talked so grimy about my people. But, like a coward I didn’t say anything. Now that she found religion when we gossip she cloth it in the disguise of “genuine concern” and add I’ll pray for them at the end of every damn sentence. Here I am trying to get the dirt or spread the word and she talking about praying for them and she is spreading the gossip worse than me! Long story short, I am getting pretty tired of gossiping about people. I know it is a very unattractive thing to do in the first place but I often find myself in the mist of gossiping before I really know it. After dealing with my cousin she make a sistah want to stop talking about people all together. I try to keep my sin and my GOD completely and totally separated but when I see her combining the two it makes me feel really low and forces me to acknowledge that gossiping can get out of hand and it is just wrong. Not to mention the person that we were gossiping about is good people and would do anything in the world for anybody (most of the time), and she would be so hurt if she heard some of the things we said about her. I actually hate I said anything at all and would take it back if I could, but since I can not undo what has been done I am no longer going to entertain gossip. I can tell that the whole situation is putting a drain on my spirit and maybe stopping my blessings as well. I can not promise I will stop cold turkey, but I will be slowing my roll when it comes to wagging my tongue about other people’s business, not to mention it is just a spineless thing to do. I have been trying to become a person of good integrity and great character. This may be God is using my addiction to gossip to turn me towards the path of truth. I can not stress to you how bad I feel about our last gossiping session, heck I may just have to cut her off for awhile. But in my defense I come from a lineage of gossipers. My grandma would know everybody’s business in the neighborhood and could give dates and times. By the time I came home from school she would give the dirt that happened on the block, like who was cheating with who, who was tricking for crack and what time the booster was coming on the block with the stuff she stole from the mall. My mama knew all her co-workers business and would tell it to anybody that would listen. Even my brother gossip, but he is the Ms. Jenkins type of gossiper (I’ma tell you about this, but if somebody ask you how you found out, you ain’t heard it from me) he could tell you who the homo thugs were and who was snitching to the cops. Anybody know of a good 12 step program in the LA area for me to join? Because this is going to be a serious fight and I know by tonight I will be jonesing for some gossip, please do not call, write, email, or text me anything that is gossip. If I start gossiping simply hang up on me or tell me to shut the hell up.

Fall Fashion Trends (part ll)

Now that we have our key pieces for fall, we must get our shoe game together. I hate seeing a sistah looking fresh to death from the ankles up, but looking a H.A.M from the ankles down. So if you think you looking fly look all the way fly. You can't half do it, if you gonna come, come correct! Here is a preview of what you will see all the fly chicks rocking this fall.

I will remind you once again, it may not be necessary to spend a fortune on shoes. These styles can be found at Payless, Target, Ross, or T.J. Maxx. However, if you are spending a great deal of time standing or you want the shoes to last more than 1 season then it may be a good idea to shell out a few more buck-o-roos. Just do like I do, which is shop to fit your budget. Shopping on a budget does not have to look like you got your whole wardrobe from the Salvation Army, if you know what you're doing (this will be addressed in a later post). Have a safe weekend everyone and happy shopping.

Fall Fashion Trends

Soon the temperatures will start to drop, the leaves will start to change colors and summer will be but a distant memory. With fall fast approaching we must get prepared for the seasons newest trends. Fall is one of my favorite seasons and shopping brings me pleasure. With that in mind, I have complied a list of fall’s (must have) key pieces. These pieces will enhance what you already have in your wardrobe and ensure that you are on point this season.

Dress Shirts with Bows

Pleated Trousers

School Boy Chic

Motorcross Jackets

Statement Coats

Metallic Totes and Purses

Chunky Knits

Hourglass Silhouette

Capes

Don't think that spending a great deal of money on clothes is the only way to enhance your fall wardrobe. You can find these trends at Kohls, H&M, Old Navy, Forever 21 and other affordable stores. However, be advised that some " key pieces" are worth the price you pay. When you lay down some serious cash for key pieces make sure they are timeless garments and not anything that is simply trendy. You'll know when you hit the jackpot because you should be able to wear them for several seasons and they should never go out of style a great example is a trench coat. Now that you have your key pieces in place tomorrow we will check out the shoe game.

The Starter Husband

In America, based on statistics a married couple has a 50% chance of staying married longer that 7 years. Now if you are a black couple your chances decrease to a 30% chance to making it to that 7 year anniversary. Heck that is not even enough time to make a dent in a 30 year mortgage or other debts married couples may accumulate. I was reading an article in Marie Claire titled “The Starter Husband” and it gave insight to why many young marriages may be failing. According to the article many young women have a casual disregard for the institution of marriage, something that can be slipped in and out of very easily. That is especially the case when there are no children involved. One woman in the article is quoted as saying, “Today marriage is the new dating and having children is the new marriage. I would have never gotten married if I didn’t think I could get out of it.” For some a starter husband is like a starter home- a semi commitment where you’re willing to do some of the surface work, like painting the walls, but not heavy lifting, like gutting the whole foundation; he’s just not a long term investment. Others compare starter husbands to a first job, where you learn some skills and polish your resume before going after the position you really want. We live in an H&M culture, where you can go out and by 10 cheap items for the season, then toss them, rather than investing in one beautiful coat you’ll wear another 10 seasons. More and more women have that throwaway mentality with their first marriage. Most of us find ourselves married and we don’t know what a real marriage is or what it is suppose to feel like. Pressure is coming from every angle to get married and start a family especially if you are 25 or older. We want to do the respectable thing and get married right ? However, women today are making new rules to divorce. Unlike their mothers and grandmothers who stayed in failed marriages for financial reasons, today’s woman can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan. There is no longer a need to stay put in an empty shell of a marriage---an agreement on paper only, instead young women are divorcing in record numbers and remarrying within 5 years. Tell me your thoughts on this do you think women between the ages of 18-35 are looking for starter husbands’ not permanent life partners.

* orginal article found in Marie Claire, written by Gretchen Voss

Life After A Three Day Weekend

Coming back to work after a three day weekend always sucks! Today is really slow and boring; the guy in the next cubicle keeps quoting Seinfeld and old Lucy and Ricardo lines. Yes, this is the type of crap I have to put up with while working in a diverse environment. I am convinced that ole boy is going to do a Timothy McVey and blow us all up when he can no longer take it anymore. He is very sensitive, fidgety, and always thinks people are out to get em. I tried to tell my boss that ole dude was crazy but she didn’t pay me any attention (they never do, until they are facing the wrong end of a 9mm). At this very moment he is singing that old 80’s song A-E-I-O, and sometimes Y. Then if that was not enough I gotta deal with my other co-worker that talks about her baby 24/7. Hell she has built a shrine to the chile on her desk and the shared file cabinets. There are literally photos everywhere and we are subjected to nonstop talk about what’s new with the baby. I have heard everything from the first words to the bowel movement schedule. Most of the time I want to tell them both to shut the hell up. Then as if I was not aggravated enough they have the air on blast and it’s very cold up in here. Needless to say I got my heater on and the window open to warm up my corner of the office. Those people (Caucasians) are always hot regardless of how cool it is outside. Then last but not least, one of the directors is always walking around here speaking Spanish to the Hispanic co-workers. He comes into the office and says Hi in English to all the English speaking people and then immediately goes into Spanish with his fellow immigrants. Now this type of sh*t pisses me off. I don’t give a damn what you speak at home or in private but to blatantly only speak in Spanish consistently at work is just wrong. Before everyone gets their panties in a bunch I have no problems with Hispanics. I just feel that if you must have a conversation in Spanish (with people that are actually bi-lingual) in front of people that don’t speak Spanish then maybe its best just to talk with that person in private.

I believe in dressing professional regardless of the work I perform. I have always been taught to dress towards your goal not your situation. So when I first started in customer service I would dress like I was the damn CEO. I believe people must be able to visualize you in key positions before you can be promoted. With all that in mind I can count on someone asking me at least once a week “why are you so dressed up”. I look crazy all weekend, but I try to look professional going to work. Professional dress adds to a person’s credibility, which can lead to advancement. I won’t complain too much because this job pays good money and I really don’t have to work too hard and I really appreciate the promotion but damn I didn’t think I would be working with the two most irritating and aggravating co-workers in my history of co-workers. But I aint no fool, I’ma get this good money, get another promotion and keep it moving. Hopefully, my next assignment will include better co-workers.